When all is lost you are found
by DaUglyChibi
Summary: Slowly Gaara begins to realize his feelings, and it makes him uneasy. What will Gaara do, follow his heart or deny his feelings and go on as he always has? Switching POVs. Yaoi Lee x Gaara. Written in First person.
1. The start of our story

Chapter 1: The start of our story

His face, radiant and beautiful... The way he moves, graceful, but with perfect precision… His smile, hypnotizing…

"No!" I suddenly screamed, not believing those were my own thoughts. No, someone must have been saying that and I was just remembering what he or she had said. I looked around to see that my sudden shout had alarmed the few people around my open office door. Well, it was my office/room/home/the place where I run the whole village. Seeing their alarmed faces made me wish they didn't care about me. Made me wish I wasn't the Kazekage, so that people wouldn't care if I suddenly started talking to myself. But they did and I needed to reassure them.

"It's alright, I just had a sudden flashback. Sorry to bother you." It wasn't really a lie… I barely noticed the people nod, saying I had no need to apologize, and so on. As they left, I absentmindedly closed my door. I sighed without realizing it and walked to sit at my desk once again. I put my head into my hands and sighed again. When did everything become so confusing? …

"**Well, it was probably when _he _showed up."**

What do you mean? What does he have to do with any of this?

"**Ah so you admit that as soon as I said '_he_' you knew who I was talking about."**

What?

"**You've been thinking about him a lot recently."**

No I haven't, I've just had to deal with a lot of stuff recently, you must be mistaken.

**"I know what you think about, and you've been thinking about him, no matter how much you deny it."**

Well, you should keep to yourself. Stop invading my thoughts. I wonder if the fox-boy has this problem…

**"Are you talking about the boy with Kyuubi in him? Oh, you have no idea. Compared to Kyuubi I'm about as bad as Jiminy Cricket."**

Some conscience you are.

**"I don't know why you're thinking about that boy anyway. You have plenty of nice girls who'd let you fuck them…"**

They don't like me. They didn't like me before I was Kazekage. They just want me because of my position.

**"And this boy, you think he liked you before you were the Kazekage? That maybe he's liked you all along? How unlike you, Gaara."**

Stop chuckling, Shukaku, and stop reading my thoughts.

**"I can't help it. You're my only form of entertainment."**

Well, stop bugging me about him. I'm having a tough time without you making fun of me.

"**Fine, but you realize you're falling in love with the boy, don't you?"**

My reply was a long and loud sigh. I let my head fall from my hands to the desk, ignoring the loud _thunk_ my head made when I let it fall.

Love, the word engraved on my forehead and yet I have no idea what it really means. What is it like to love someone? Am I in love with him? What is it like to be loved by someone? Does he love me? It's all too confusing. I need to get back to running the village. I don't have time to be thinking about him…

As if on cue someone knocked on my door. "Come on in." I called, lifting my head off my desk and sitting up straight, regaining my composure. It was the woman from the front desk. I recalled her name with ease, since she always insisted on bringing up my urgent messages herself. I was pretty sure she wanted me, but I have no interest in her. In fact, I almost despise her because she's so desperate. But I put on a fake half-smile and greeted her warmly nonetheless.

"Shiya, I'm glad to see you. What is it this time?" I said, reaching for the oversized manila envelope she was handing me over my desk.

"An urgent message from Konoha Village." She said, smiling at me, trying to use her charm to win me over. I didn't notice her in the slightest, though. Which was a waste, since she was such a beautiful woman.

"Thank you, you may leave now." I said, still hiding my hostility.

"Well, actually, Gaara-sama, I was wondering if you wanted to…" She said boldly, blushing and trying to look cute as she said it.

"I said you may go now. Please leave." I said, interrupting her. My voice had lost all warmth and she was completely shocked. But I guess I sounded kind of angry, so she left without another word, thinking to herself that she had hoped Gaara-sama had liked her at least a little bit…She'd keep trying, maybe today was just a bad day.

I looked down at the envelope, opening it carefully after she had left. It was unlikely that this had anything to do with him but… Maybe it did, and that put me on the edge. I wanted to see him and yet, I knew that I shouldn't see him. That I was going insane from thinking about him, that I was driving myself crazy with these mixed up emotions.

I got the documents out of the envelope and began to read them, pushing my other papers aside. It was a document requesting permission for one of their ninjas to visit me. Not the village, me. As I read through, I found the name of the ninja who they wanted me to see…

Rock Lee… 


	2. The circumference of my world

Chapter: 2 The circumference of my world

I kept my cool, even though I could feel my face warm up a bit. I must have been blushing, how often did that happen? I quickly wiped off the smirk that was forming on my face, grateful that Shiya had shut the door on her way out. If anyone saw me acting so strange, they'd defiantly tell me I was crazy. I know I shouldn't have been so excited by this notice, that it was just a coincidence and that he was coming to see me for business, and yet… He was coming to see me. I felt myself smiling but this time I didn't stop myself. I quickly and merrily signed the papers, agreeing to see him. I began humming and caught myself.

What was I doing? Why was I acting like this? When I had met him all I wanted to do was hurt him. I wanted to make him feel pain like no other. I had hated him. Him and his happiness, his friends, his life… I had even tried to kill him. I had wanted to end that happy lifestyle of his. I had wanted to end his life. And now just the sight of his name written on this document brought me happiness. What had puberty done to me?

I heard Shukaku laughing at me and frowned. "Stop laughing, pest." I accidentally said aloud. Luckily my door was already shut this time.

**"Don't be so mean to me. You're way of thinking is just too funny, I couldn't help it."**

What do you mean by that? And why are you continuing to laugh at me?

"**I'm sorry I'll stop now."**

Thank you. Now tell me why you were laughing in the first place.

**"I was laughing at how you think about the boy. First you're getting excited about his name and then you're remembering how much you had wanted to kill him."**

Yeah, so? I don't think that's funny at all. I think it's rather confusing.

**"Ah, but don't you know Gaara? Love and hate are two sides of the same coin."**

Whatever, what's your point?

**"You and the boy are complete opposites, maybe that's what makes you want him so much."**

What do you mean? We're not so different…

**"Oh, but you are so different. He's very tall and you're practically a midget…"**

Don't insult my height. I'm still growing, you'll see, one day I'll be six feet tall.

**"Yeah, right, whatever. You didn't let me finish. The biggest thing is that he's an optimist and you're very pessimistic. He's social with a lot of friends and you're one of the most anti-social teenagers I've ever met, even though you run a village."**

Sounds like you're just trying to bad-mouth me now.

**"What if I am?" Hesnickered. "So what I think is happening is that you're falling in love with him because he's everything you're not. He's everything you wish you could be. That's all, it's not like you really love him, is it?"**

Leave me alone for a while, please?

**"Fine, but only because you sound so pitiful right now."**

I sighed again; I seem to be doing that a lot more as of late. I looked down at my desk, seeing the papers I had signed only moments ago. It was making me dizzy, how fast my emotions seemed to change. Did I love him? What is love? What was it like to love someone? I seemed to ask myself these questions and more like them a lot when I was thinking about him. Is what Shukaku said true? Do I love him only because I wish I were like him? Or is it something else? What is it I feel towards him? Jealousy? Hate? Resentment? Or maybe…love?

A loud knocking on my door woke me to reality and I got up to open the door for the person on the other side. Getting up cleared my thoughts, and focusing on finding out who was behind the door drove away my thoughts of Lee. I put on another fake small smile and was greeted with the cheery face of Shiya.

"Did you finish the paperwork for the Konoha Village? The ninja who delivered it insists he gets the paperwork back before he leaves. Must be really urgent." That's exactly what I was thinking, why is this so urgent? And I wonder who's out there waiting for it. Surely not Lee himself?

"I finished it. Let me put it back in its envelope and you may take it back to our guest." I shoved the papers into the envelope and curiosity got the better of me. "What does our guest…um, look like?" I said, wanting to know if it was Lee or not.

"Well, he's got really thick eyebrows, a green jumpsuit, and really dorky black hair…" She went on to say things about how he was creepy looking, but I wasn't listening. Was it Lee? Sure sounded like him.

"I'll go deliver this to our guest myself if you don't mind?" I said, motioning for her to move out of the doorway. She quickly replied that it was fine and moved out of the way. I nodded thanks to her and headed towards the front waiting area. Surely it wasn't Lee, but I had to be sure. I almost ran towards the waiting room but stopped myself and continued to walk calmly. As I came to the waiting room I recognized the man she was talking about. At first I only saw him from behind and from afar, so I mistook him for Lee for a moment. But as I came closer I saw he was much too tall to be Lee? I didn't remember Lee being that tall, or a jounin rank ninja.

As the man turned towards me, I finally recognized him as Gai, Lee's sensei. I'd almost forgotten how much they looked alike. Like father and son, yet I was told that there was no relation between them. As he turned he spotted me, instantly smiling, looking even more like an older version of Lee. As he came toward me, I almost panicked. He was so much taller than me and it looked as if he was going to come over here and pick me up. Which, unbelievably, he did. He walked right over to me and lifted me up off the ground, swinging me around in a circle before putting me back down. He smiled the whole time, and I believe I was almost quivering in fear. This man really freaked me out.

"Gaara! I mean, Kazekage-san, of course." He said, still smiling. I had finally gotten control of my rapidly beating heart and I felt myself breath again. He held out his hand for me to shake, and I timidly put my hand on his, my hand barely able to grasp his palm. I shook it lightly.

"Gai, a pleasure seeing you. What brings you here?" I said, even thought I knew he was here for the envelope in my other hand. I took back my hand and placed it carefully by my side. But why was he really here? Was he the one who suggested making the form to have Lee meet with me? And why would he do something like that?

"I'm here for that envelope in your left hand, but I'm sure you already knew that. You're asking why I brought that form to you in the first place, correct?" I was surprised at how fast he seemed to catch on, even though he looked as if he'd be on the dense side. I guess there was more to him that looks.

"Yes, you are correct. Are you going to answer that question?"

"Of course I will, but I can't tell you everything, that'd spoil the surprise." He said, his smile widening as he chuckled a bit. "Lee has been acting strangely recently, and I suspected it had something to do with you." Here, he winked at me, as if this was some kind of inside joke between the two of us. I wasn't laughing. My mind was reeling. "So anyway, I wrote this document up with Tsunade-chan. I haven't told Lee about it yet, but he'll surely be happy to see you. You did sign 'yes' didn't you?" He said, worry clouding his face. I nodded, not sure that I could speak at the moment. At this he smiled again. "So, Lee shall be coming to visit you three days from now. That's alright with you, right?" He paused looking at me with concern. I felt my knees becoming weak and saw the room spinning. I felt the blood drain from my face and closed my eyes. The last thing I heard was Gai's voice. "Gaara? Gaara! Are you alright?"


	3. Photograph

Chapter 3: Photograph

I woke up the next morning to the sun glaring through the window and onto my face. I sat up long enough to pull the curtains closed, and then I laid down again. My head hurt, badly. My first thoughts were…

Don't bug me today, Shukaku.

**"Fine, I was planning on resting today anyway. Don't try and bug me later on though."**

Fine, you don't bug me, I won't bug you.

**"Deal."**

I put my hand to my forehead, feeling that my temperature was normal. Why had I fainted so suddenly? I must have been feeling sick, surely not because Lee was coming in three days… Lee's coming to see me in three days! I'm excited yet sick with anticipation. So many of the things Gai had said to me last night confused me. What did he mean by saying Lee's been acting weird and I'm to blame? Shukaku had said I'm acting weird and Lee's to blame… Did that mean he was feeling the same way I was? What would his reaction be to Gai telling him about our already scheduled meeting? Will he be angry? Will he be happy? Happy to see me…? What if Gai's already told him? How has he reacted? Is he really coming to see me?

I turned over on my bed and shoved my face into my pillows. My entire bed was a deep shade of crimson. My walls light brown and made of sand, the curtains and most everything else in my room the same shade of crimson as my bed. But as I looked up from the pillows and around my room I saw something was out of place. I looked at my bedside table; a photograph was placed upon it. I hadn't remembered putting it there and it surely wasn't there the last time I had gone to bed. When was the last time I had gone to bed? One good thing about fainting, it helped me catch up on my sleep. I finally moved my arm over to reach for the photograph. I picked it up and lying on my side I looked at it. I had definitely not put this picture there.

It was a picture of Lee, but not like the usual photographs I've seen of Lee. He wasn't doing his token 'Nice Guy Pose' but instead, he was just sitting there, gazing off into space. It was an incredibly sexy picture of him. He wasn't smiling like he usually was, but he wasn't frowning either. He looked like he was in deep thought. As I looked at him, almost wanting to hug the photograph, I saw through the photo that there was something written on the back. I turned it over to read, reading aloud to myself.

"Gaara, this is what I meant by Lee acting weird. He looks so… not Lee. I've heard him mutter your name to himself while he's like this. Please make Lee act like himself again!

-Gai"

I turned the picture back over to stare at Lee some more. He just looked so…lonely. And Gai was right, that was very un-Lee like. But he was still beautiful, if not even more enticing then before. Maybe he was thinking about me… Maybe he's thinking about me right now… Maybe, just maybe, this was love…

Feeling much better I slowly got up out of bed, not bothering to change my clothes or brush my hair as I went out of my bedroom and into my office. I didn't notice I was still carrying my picture of Lee and sat down behind my desk. Upon noticing the photograph in my hand I hurriedly shoved it into the top drawer or my desk, stuffing it beside important paperwork and many ink pens. I realized how crazy it was of me to hide that photo like it was porn, but to me, it was so much better than any porn I'd ever seen or probably will ever see. The expression on Lee's face was enough to get me blushing. I quickly slammed the drawer shut as Shiya entered my office.

"Oh Gaara-sama, is this a bad time? I'm glad to see you're…uh, feeling better." She said nervously. I was probably quite the sight, sitting there, my hair more of a mess than usual, my clothes from yesterday still on me, now wrinkled, and my hand still resting upon the handle of the drawer I just suddenly slammed shut. Not to mention I was probably giving her a very un-Gaara like look of confusion and bewilderment.

"No, Shiya, it's alright, sorry for making you worry." I said, regaining my sanity, trying to flatten my hair at least a little bit. I tugged at my shirt, trying to get some of the wrinkles out.

"It's okay Gaara-sama, we were all worried about you." She said, smiling. And I felt a pain in my chest, because they weren't really worried about me, as Gaara, they were worried about the Kazekage. If I hadn't been the Kazekage none of them would have cared. If I weren't the Kazekage… would Lee still want to see me? I felt myself frowning and looked back up at Shiya. She was still smiling.

"Shiya, would you please bring me my morning cup of coffee?" I said, resting my head on one of my hands.

"Certainly, do you want it black, like usual?" She asked, heading for the door.

"No, I'm feeling a bit different today. Add some creamer or whatever it is you put in your coffee." I said, wanting to try something new.

"Any particular flavor?" She said, still kind of shocked that I had ask for something other than black coffee.

"Give me a little bit of each." I said, smiling. She just gave me a weird half smile and nodded, walking away to fetch my insanely sweet coffee. I decided to change my clothes while I waited for her to bring me my coffee. I took out a clean black short-sleeved shirt and clean black slacks. This was my usual casual attire. I felt like wearing something else, but wanted to save my good clothes for when Lee arrived. He was coming here in just three days…Wait, no, I've miscalculated. Yesterday Gai said he was coming in three days so that means that now he's coming in only two days! Is that enough time for me to get ready? Why do I suddenly feel like I'm unprepared? What would I need to get done before he got here? I thought of those and about fifty other questions like them while I got dressed and brushed my hair. As I came out of my bedroom and back into my office Shiya came in through the other door with my coffee. I quickly walked over to her and took my steamy tan liquid from her.

"Thank you." I said as I walked over to my desk and sat down.

"Are you sure you're going to drink that?" She said, still not believing I could consume something so sugary and sweet.

"I'm sure I'll manage." I said, waiting for her to leave and shut the door before I brought the mug to my lips. I blew softly over the mug to cool the liquid down a bit before I took a sip. It was sweet, and most people would probably call it disgusting but I really enjoyed the unusual taste of the overly sweet liquid. The creamer itself had cooled down the coffee so I quickly chugged the rest of the liquid and set down the mug.

As I wiped my lips with the back of my hand I looked down at the paperwork that need to be done. Feeling like a completely different person I picked up a pen out of the top drawer, stealing a look at the photo of Lee. I smiled to myself and began to read the papers over and fill them out.

After about an hour of this, someone knocked at my door. I called that they could enter and Shiya opened my door.

"Gaara-sama, I see you have most of your work done for today already!" She exclaimed, seeing the pile of finished paperwork on my desk. She then spotted the empty mug. "And I see you drank that coffee…" She said, almost disgusted. She had taken a sip of the concoction before giving it to Gaara and she had thought it rather disgusting. But she didn't say anything since it seemed he had liked it so very much.

"Yes, Shiya, I feel very productive today. And after you get me a new cup of that coffee and take my finished paper work, I'd like the paperwork for the next couple days." I said calmly, handing her the empty mug as she approached my desk.

"Would you like it the same as before? Or black this time?" She said, looking down at the empty mug, not believing I had actually drank the coffee from earlier.

"Same as before, please. I think that might be how I have my coffee from now on." I said, smiling. She nodded in disbelief but still walked out the door to go get me another glass. I finished up the last of today's paperwork before she got back with my coffee and took the mug from her. I guess she had nothing much to say because she just took the paperwork off my desk without uttering so much as a syllable. Which was a good thing, because I believed that she talked all too much in the first place. Though her new silence was awkward and I didn't like it. I was drinking the sugary liquid as she came back in with more paper work. I set the mug down as she set the papers down on my desk.

"Shiya, is something wrong? You seem quiet." I said, looking at her with concern. Was something happening outside my office that she didn't want to tell me about? She shook her head at me, which concerned me even more.

"It's just, you've been acting weird lately and now after that man came over you've been changing. It's like you're keeping a secret from the rest of us." She said sadly, looking away from me and out the large window behind me. I stood and turned to look out the window, down at the village. I saw people walking around, newlyweds with new born babes, couples holding hands, children playing, old women working. I sighed and turned back to look at Shiya.

"What's it like to be in love?" I suddenly asked her.

"What? What do you mean Gaara-sama?" She said nervously, blushing.

"You must be at least 5 or 6 years older than me. You must have experienced love by now. So what's it like, being in love?" I said, sitting back down and looking at her.

"Well, Gaara-sama, first off, you shouldn't talk to a woman about her age." She said, still blushing a bit. She was 24 and he was 16, an eight-year difference. But she hid her age well; she didn't look a day over 19. "Second off, I have been in love before…but that was a long time ago." She said, looking away from me, not wanting to see me curiously staring at her.

"So? How long ago was it? What was he like? What was it like being in love with him?" I asked, knowing she couldn't deny me answers. I was the Kazekage, and she was in the palm of my hand. But she didn't seem too reluctant with the information.

"Well, it wasn't a he, really. It was a girl named Kita." She said, sadly gazing off into the distance.


	4. Shiya's story

Chapter 4: Shiya's Story

"It was about 9 years ago. I was a little younger than you are now." She said, getting ready to go into flashback mode.

"You're older that I first thought, then." I said, not meaning to be mean, but it came out that way.

"Shhh! I'm about to go into flashback story telling." She said, now really wanting to share her story. "As I said it was about 9 years ago, her name was Kita…"

I remember the autumn leaves falling; I loved the sight of those dying leaves even more than the sight of cherry blossoms. That was when I met her; she turned my world upside down.

She had long raven black hair and pale skin. Which was a contrast to my mid shoulder length golden blonde hair and tan skin. But when I saw her that September evening, I knew she was beautiful. Not just outwardly beautiful but a beautiful personality. The leaves just made her beauty even more hypnotizing. I paused, seeing her walking towards me.

"Hey, are you new around here?" I said loudly, walking up to her. I was a big tomboy back then. I even hid my hair in a short ponytail. She looked at me curiously before answering.

"Yes, I'm new. Do you know where I can go to see Kazekage-sama?" She asked, her voice soft and musical. I nodded roughly and made sure my mouth wasn't agape. She was just so beautiful…

"Um, yeah, I know where you can go to see him. I could take you there, that is, if you wanted me to." I said, my voice growing quiet. I was feeling myself losing my masculine front and melting in front of her. She smiled and I felt as if my heart would explode.

"If it's not too much trouble." She said politely, extending her hand for me to shake. "My name's Kita, by the way." She said as I shook her hand. I could feel myself blush at her touch.

"Uh, it's no trouble at all." I said, taking my hand back. "I'm Shiya." I said, trying to stop my heart from beating so fast. It felt as if it would burst. No one had made me feel like this before, man or woman.

"Then let's go, I was supposed to be here this morning." She said, laughing a bit. "I got held up, I hope he understands."

"I'm sure he won't mind it too much. May I ask why you're here in the first place?" I said, feeling too girly for it to be comfortable. I started walking towards the Kazekage's place with her following behind.

"Well, I'm a replacement ninja for one of the ninja teams. I was told their third member died in a horrid accident." She said sadly. And that was when I knew it was fate. I felt myself sadden at the mention of my former teammate. I almost cried, but men don't cry and I decided I couldn't cry, either. It had been three months since he died. He experienced a horrid yet mysterious death. All we saw before we found his decapitated body was men in red and black coats rushing past us. When we turned to look at him he was already dead. Rihu and I both cried that day, and he continued to cry for several days after that. That was when I became even more of a man, but all that was seeming to fade around this new girl. I was almost ready to tell her all about it but I knew that the Kazekage probably wanted to tell her himself. So I just walked in silence, hearing her stepping on the fallen leaves behind me. Feeling awkward I turned around to walk backwards, so I could look at her.

"So, you just got here right? Why don't I take you to get something to eat first? You're probably hungry, aren't you?" I said smiling, trying to get my mind off my fallen comrade.

"Well, I think I should see Kazekage-sama first, but after that I'd be glad to get something to eat." She said, and I heard her stomach growl. I laughed as I continued to look at her and walk backwards towards the Kazekage's office building.

"Okay then, I'll hurry up and get you to the Kazekage and then we can go and eat something, alright?" I said, feeling myself smiling openly for the first time since he had died. But just as Kita was about to say something I felt myself run into someone. I turned to see my teammate, Rihu.

"Hey Rihu." I said, feeling my smile fade at the sight of his saddened face.

"You seem to be feeling better, Shiya." He said, trying to hide his sadness with a fake smile. He looked behind me to see Kita. "Who's she?" He said, his fake smile fading away into sadness again.

"Oh, this is Kita, Kita this is my teammate, Rihu." I said, turning so I could see the both of them. I expected to see Kita extend her hand to him like she did for me but instead she just bowed lightly to him.

"A pleasure meeting you." She said, almost coldly compared to how she had greeted me. Maybe I was just imagining it.

"Well, I'm in the middle of something, I'll see you later, Shiya. Nice meeting you, Kita." He said before leaving.

"Well then, let's go." I said, leading the way, we were almost there. She followed behind me and we walked in silence. Soon enough we were there.

Let's just skip it all, and I'll give you the shorter version. I was in love with her, she changed me, and for the longest time I thought she was in love with me, too. But when we were all 19 Rihu announced their engagement, and Kita asked me to be her bridesmaid. I had to refuse though, and soon enough we grew apart. I haven't spoken to either of them since then. But even now when I think of her my heart skips a beat at what never was.

"And that's my story, Gaara-sama." Shiya said to me and I just kind of blankly looked at her. That ending had thrown me for a total loop.

"How could she do that?" I said, now angry, for who knows what reason.

"How could who do what?" Shiya said, confused.

"How could Kita run off with that man when you loved her so much? How could she lead you on like that? That's horrible!" I said, now becoming concerned for Shiya, I hadn't liked her before now but after hearing that I felt we shared some kind of bond. Weirdest of all I felt is was a rather womanly bond. Like we were longtime girlfriends or something.

"It's okay Gaara-sama, I've gotten over it…" She said, faking a smile.

"No, it's not okay. What did you say her name was? Kita… I need a last name. She probably still lives in this village or one of the surrounding ones. I think I might need to have a meeting with her…" I started, planning on having her and that man of hers sent to live out in the surrounding desert, not allowed to come back here for any reason whatsoever. But I stopped when I saw the tears in Shiya's eyes.

"Please Gaara-sama, it's okay. I'm totally…" She paused to sniffle, "over her." She was now crying silent tears, wiping them off with the back of her hand. I almost wanted to go to her and comfort her but I didn't. I instead handed her a handkerchief, so she wouldn't dirty her nice suit with tear stains.

"Whatever you wish, Shiya. If you want to you can take the rest of today off and go see her." I said, almost reading her thoughts. Of course I knew what she really wanted, what she was thinking, because we were both in forbidden love. Hearing her story made me realize it. I'm in love with Lee. How far my love for him went was something I'd have to figure out myself.

"Thank you Gaara-sama. I really mean it, thank you." She said, wiping off the last of her tears. As she left I gave her a genuine smile. She gave me one in return and I watched her from the window in my office as she made her way to her love's home.

I notified a different woman to take her place at the front desk, and that I didn't need any help for the rest of the day. That'd I bring up the paper work for the next couple days myself. The girl nodded and I smiled at her as I went back to my office.

I drank the rest of my coffee, now cold, but still pretty good. And as I finished up the paperwork for tomorrow and the next day I smiled. Finishing this work meant I'd have more time to prepare myself for Lee. I picked up the heavy pile of paperwork and made my way up the front desk, which wasn't the same since Shiya wasn't there.

"Thank you." The woman I posted there said. The place was empty, since it was nearing 10 PM. I heard the woman yawn loudly and turned to face her.

"Miss, once you finish putting away that paperwork you may leave. I'll add something to your paycheck for helping me out." Her face brightened and she smiled, thanking me at least three times. "No, miss, I must thank you. Please feel free to leave the place as it is once you finish putting away the paper work. I'll lock up." She thanked me again and I left her, feeling very unlike myself.

I was never really nice to my employees like that before, and it felt kind of nice, to see her face brighten like that. As I entered my office and shut the door I felt myself yawn, which was also very un-Gaara like. Feeling like a completely different person, I decided to put on the pajamas I never used, since I never really slept. They were a lighter shade of crimson than my room, almost the same color as my hair. Before I put them on I took a quick shower, washing my hair and cleaning myself of any dirt that might have somehow gotten onto me. I got out of the shower and dried myself, putting on a clean pair of black boxers. I looked at myself, looking a sickly pale, but not as sickly as before. I guess my personality wasn't the only thing changing. My hair also seemed a bit longer than before, the back and parts of the side now lightly touching my shoulders. I felt weird, like I was…tired? I felt my limbs grow heavy and my eyes start to close. And without putting on my pajamas or locking up the place I crawled into bed, covering myself in the warm crimson sheets. And I let the unknown feeling of sleep take me over.


	5. And a very good morning to you Mrrabbit

Chapter 5: And a very good morning to you, Mr. Rabbit 

I woke up suddenly to a pair of round black eyes staring into my own light green ones. Not yet used to waking up and definitely not used to waking up to see someone looking down at me, I let out a gasp and pulled the covers completely over me with only my head exposed. As I looked at the boy standing on my ceiling looking down at me I recognized it to be Lee.

"Lee! What are you doing here? In my bedroom and a day too early?" I said, trying to remain calm. He just smiled at me, and with him still being upside down made it look kind of funny to me. He also looked kind of funny with his hair falling away from his face like that, but still handsome.

"I'm coming down now, Gaara-san." He simply said, and I nodded. He gracefully landed from the ceiling onto my bed, his legs on either side of me. I sat up and rested my back against my headboard as he kneeled down. He was straddling me now and I felt myself tense up. It was then that I remembered that I had no shirt or pants on, just my boxers. I tried to pull the covers up to my chin and hide myself but Lee was on the covers and I couldn't, so I was left there, chest completely exposed.

"Gaara-san, you look a lot healthier!" He exclaimed, looking at me and smiling. I looked at him, his hair had grown out a little and it flipped on the sides a bit. It was very cute, and made him look even more like a little boy. But he definitely wasn't little, he was about a foot taller than me now, I could tell just by him sitting there. Oh yeah, he was just sitting there, on top of me. I felt myself grow dizzy with anticipation of all the fun things we could do with him on top of me. I stopped myself from thinking like that and snapped myself back into reality.

"Lee, you haven't answered me, what are you doing here so early? And you've even snuck into my private quarters." I said, trying to keep my cool and remain level headed. The boy I loved was on top of me, for Christ's sake. I crossed my arms over my chest, trying to hide my exposed body.

"Well, Gai-sensei told me you fainted before he left and I just couldn't wait. I had to make sure you were okay." He said looking at me, finally realizing that he was on top of me and it was making me uncomfortable. "Sorry, Gaara-san." He muttered as he got off me. But I decided instead of hiding under the covers it would be better just to get up and get dressed. So as he got off my bed I threw the covers off and stood up. I saw him glance at my almost naked body and I held back a smile. At least now I knew he was interested in me sexually. That's always a good start. I walked over to my dresser and pulled out a nice long sleeved black top and knee-length black shorts. I looked at Lee looking at me out of the corner of his eye and I was tempted to strip myself instead of getting dressed, just to see what his reaction would be. But I didn't and I got my clothes on before going over to my bathroom.

"What time is it, anyway?" I asked aloud as I picked up my comb to use on my hair. I wasn't expecting an answer but got one anyway.

"5:57." Lee replied.

"AM or PM?" I asked, not believing that he would sneak into my room at 5:57 in the morning.

"AM, of course. Do you usually sleep until that time of night, Gaara-san?" He asked, pushing back my curtain to look down at the village and the rising sun. I had to admit it was a breath taking sight. I set my comb down and walked over to him; he was looking down at the village in awe.

"I usually don't sleep at all, to tell you the truth." I replied.

"Why, Gaara-san? Sleep is good for you, it helps you regain your energy and start off the new day with a smile." He said, turning away from the window and looking at me, concern showing in his face.

"That's why I drink coffee." I replied. I was now standing next to him, our difference in height obvious.

"But Gaara-san, coffee's bad for you and stunts your growth! So does lack of sleep, maybe that's why you're so short…" He started to say but stopped when I glared at him.

"Well, we all can't be giants. Maybe you're just really tall." I said, anger entering my voice.

"Oh. No. Gaara-san, I didn't mean it like that, I'm sorry. Please don't be angry with me…" He said, looking rather sad that'd he'd messed things up and gotten me angry so early on. I suddenly wasn't angry anymore and I just wanted to hug him and say 'It's okay, I could never be angry with you.' Like in some kind of crazy romance novel, but I didn't.

"It's alright, Lee. I shouldn't be so sensitive about my height." I replied, but it sounded out of my head, not like something I would usually say. What was he doing to me? Just being around him made me giddy as a schoolgirl, which isn't a term I use lightly. Especially when I'm talking about myself, the boy who's never happy, ever. He had dropped the curtains and the view was now closed off. I pulled the curtains back and placed them on their hooks so we could see out the window. I had a better view in my office, but this just seemed more, well intimate. His face wasn't frowning anymore and now he wore a half smile.

"Wow, it's so beautiful, Gaara-san." He said, looking down at the village.

"Did you not see it on your way here?" I said, since it was obvious that this was his first good look at the village.

"Well, it was dark when I got here." He said and I wonder just how long he'd been in here, looking at me while I was sleeping. Actually, I was wondering how he got in here at all, especially this early in the morning. No one should even be in for work yet. Who let him in?

"Lee, how did you get in here in the first place?" I asked as we looked out the window, standing side by side. I still couldn't believe it, here he was, standing beside me, and all I wanted to know was how he got there in the first place. It shouldn't matter, and I stopped myself from hugging him, from showing him any affection. And I didn't know why, was it maybe because I was scared that he didn't love me? We turned to look at each other in the same instant, and my heart skipped a beat.

"Well, all the doors were open so I just let myself in. Is that how it usually is?" I forgot to lock up last night. I had been so out of it I had forgotten to lock up the place! I almost panicked.

"Lee, did you see anyone else in here? Was anything, well, out of place? Anything missing?" I said, becoming frantic as I looked around, but I felt him place strong hands on my shoulders and I stopped moving around.

"I suspected someone forgot to lock the place up so I checked it. It didn't look like anything happened, luckily. There's no need to worry about it, Gaara-san." He said, his hands on my shoulders and his eyes locked in mine. I wanted to cry in happiness and cling to him, but I didn't, I just solemnly shook my head.

"Thanks, Lee." I said quietly, looking away. He looked at me and frowned.

"It's okay Gaara-san, it's just you and me here. Nothing's happened, don't worry about it. I even locked the place back up. Just, don't worry, about anything, ever, Gaara-san." He said as he boldly embraced me. It was awkward, since I only came up to lower part of his chest. But it was comforting and I felt like I never wanted to move. I was warm, but not too warm, and I felt like I could walk on air. If him holding me made me feel like this I wondered how great it would feel to go farther. There was a bed placed ever so close to us, so close it was suffocating me… I needed him, he's just too great, too great for words to describe and yet here I am describing him. Just as I was beginning to think we'd stay like this forever he pulled back and looked at me. I was just getting comfy so the look on my face was probably one of surprise. I hadn't wanted him to pull away from me, ever.

"Are you feeling better, Gaara-san?" He asked, smiling a soft smile at me. I nodded and he ruffled my hair, making me feel like a little kid. And I never thought feeling like a little kid could be so enjoyable. This man was making me feel emotions I never thought I had. Making me feel ways I never thought possible. And this was just the beginning.


	6. Whatever happened to the good old days?

Lee's Point of view for a chapter!

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Chapter 6: What ever happened to the good old days?

"Lee, would you like to see an even more beautiful view of the village?" He asked me as he made his way to the door. I didn't want to leave his room; it was a nice feeling, knowing I was in his room, that I was here, in his private area, and he didn't kick me out. But I still nodded as he opened the door and led me into the office. I had been so focused on getting everything locked up for Gaara-san and getting to him that I hadn't stopped to really look at the different rooms in the building. I looked around the office, amazed. It was really spacious and organized. But as I looked over to where Gaara-san was standing I could feel myself become agape. It was a giant widow that took up almost the entire wall. A thick red curtain had hid it before but as Gaara-san pulled back the curtain I knew this was something he was proud of. He turned back towards me and gave me a small proud smile.

"Its amazing Gaara-san!" I declared, walking closer to him and the window. You could see all of the main village and everything in it. The sun rising behind it only added to the beauty of it all. There were a few early risers already out on the street, making the scene almost surreal.

"Yes, this window was already like this when I became the Kazekage, though. I just added the crimson curtains." He said, thinking I was complementing the window.

"No, Gaara-san, not the window. Your village, it's so beautiful, just like you." I said, letting my thoughts slip out of my mouth before I even realized what I was saying. But it was too late; I just had to hope he wasn't angry. I awaited his reaction but he was silent. He just looked out at the village, a half smile on his face.

"I finished my paper work for today beforehand so all I'd really like to do today is organize this place a bit. I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow, you know." He said suddenly as he walked over to the high backed leather chair behind his desk.

"I know, I'm sorry, Gaara-san." I said, looking at him as he gracefully sat down in the chair and turned towards me. He looked even smaller in that huge chair, I wondered if he knew that? He was wearing his usual grimace but seeing him look so small made him irresistibly cute. I wanted to just pick him up and cuddle him but I knew that would only make matters worse.

"It's not your fault, Lee. If anything I'm glad you came today. It makes things more interesting." He said as he smiled mischievously at me. Like he was plotting something and my arriving early made his plans run that much smoother. I wondered what he was thinking about. And why was he staring at me like that? Why was this all seeming like sexual innuendo and yet this was a very serious conversation? Did I think everything he said was sexual? And why would I think like that? Why did I feel this way about him in the first place? While I was busy thinking, he turned back to his desk and began to organize it, even though it already looked pretty well organized. I saw him pull out a small paper that looked somewhat like a photograph and he quickly shoved it under some papers, like it was something he shouldn't have. I was curious to what the picture was of but I didn't ask him. What if it was pornography? Or a picture of someone he really cared about? For a split second I thought maybe it was a photograph of myself, but that was hoping for too much. Why would he want a photograph of me? He didn't even kind of like me. He had even tried to kill me… And yet I felt these feeling for him.

It was a very clean office, and as I said, rather spacious. But it was also kind of empty. I saw there were no other chairs in the room, and other than the desk and chair Gaara-san was already in there were only a few potted plants in the room. So I chose to sit on the floor against the wall by a small plant that looked sort of like a palm tree. From where I was I had a side view of Gaara-san organizing his desk. I was wondering what he looked like from the front, sitting at the large desk in that oversized chair. Being the small person he was I bet it was a rather comical sight. He's so angry, sad, and lonely, yet insanely cute. Maybe that was why I liked him so much? No, it went deeper than that. My feelings were confusing me and I wondered what made me feel this way toward him. I couldn't even remember when I had started feeling this way towards him. I mean, after he broke my arm and leg, I had nearly hated him. But now, all those feelings seemed to vanish. I'd forgiven him, and more than that, I felt my feelings ran deeper than I could ever tell.

And how had Gai-sensei known I needed to see Gaara-san? How had he gotten Gaara-san to agree to see me? Did Gaara-san agree because he felt something towards me? Did he agree because he thought I'd amuse him? I looked up at Gaara-san, who was completely ignoring me; he was still messing around with the items in his desk. I felt sad because he was ignoring me, I had come all this way to see him and now all he could think of to do while I was here was organize his already organized desk? I wanted to throw him down and express my feelings towards him in ways that would probably make him smack me. But I really didn't care. My head was spinning with all the things I could do to him before the sun could rise completely and the workers arrive here. I didn't care about the consequences; I wanted to express my love for him. But I stopped myself. What if I went too fast? What if I scared him away? What if I was wrong and he still hated me, and the only reason he agreed to let me come see him was so that he could kill me? I was being a lot more pessimistic than usual. Did thinking about someone too much cause you to become like them? Because the more I thought about Gaara-san the more I frowned. Yet I knew I no longer hated him. Was this feeling I had towards him really love? If it wasn't love, what was it? I'm asking myself too many questions that have no real answers. I was just making myself feel insane.

I decided to stop thinking so much, so I just gazed at Gaara-san absentmindedly. Not thinking of anything in particular I noticed how swiftly Gaara-san moved. How nice he looked, how cute he was in long sleeves. How pale he was and how much his red hair was a contrast to that. How majestic the tattoo on his forehead looked. One word, written in kanji, 'love.' He didn't seem to be full of love and yet it was there, etched into his forehead. In fact, he seemed very depressed, and lonely. I wondered how that made him feel, to be so sad and lonely, yet have the word 'love' carved into his skin.

But, right at this moment he didn't seem as sad or lonely, he seemed almost pleased. He was also looking healthier, lovelier than I had remembered. And it was then I got up without realizing it. I walked toward him in a daze; he didn't even notice me until I was only a step away from him. He turned to look at me, to ask me what I was doing. But before he could utter a word I leaned down, almost kneeling. I took his face and cupped it into my hands before I laid my lips upon his. He put up little to no resistance. He stiffened when I first put my lips to his but as I moved myself even closer to him he seemed to loosen, almost lean into me. I moved my hands to rest upon his small shoulders as my tongue begged for entrance into his mouth. He slowly parted his lips as I shoved my tongue in. Even I was surprised at how passionate I was feeling. As my tongue took dominance over his mouth, I heard him moan into me. It caught me off guard, his sudden emotion, and made me want him even more. It excited me and I almost forgot to break away to breathe. As I broke away, we both panted, our breath hot on each other's faces. Only an inch away from his face, I could feel our mingled saliva running down my chin, and I knew he probably had even more on him. I looked at him with half-lidded eyes, a small successful smile on my face. I heard him take in a fast breath as I leaned into him, pressing my lips against his once more. More than that, I pressed my entire self against him, wanting to feel him with every inch of me. I felt him place his arms around me, slowly, with caution. I put my own arms around him, while continuing to explore his mouth with my tongue. I felt him go limp with pleasure in my arms as he let a small moan escape him. I moved my hands to the small of his back, lifting his shirt slightly, putting my hands under it, feeling his warm flesh. Just as I was thinking of completely removing the shirt I heard a faraway sound that reminded me of someone opening a door. I ignored it; I'd come too far to stop now. I don't even think Gaara-san heard the sound, so I continued, not caring that some woman I didn't recognize was standing at the door. She looked as us, agape. She seemed in shock for a moment and I was glad; gave me more time to hold him here in my arms.

"Gaara-sama…" She finally uttered softly, finally getting Gaara-sans attention. As she said this I felt Gaara-san stiffen in my arms and break away from me, to look at her in shock. Trying to play the part of someone caught red-handed, I quickly broke away from him and wiped my mouth on my arm, which was covered in bandages, so it wasn't like I was wiping saliva on my skin. He wiped his mouth too, but kept his arm there as if to hide his blushing face. His face was almost the same shade of crimson as his hair. When he finally took his arm away from his face he had somewhat regained control over his features.

"Oh, Shiya, fancy meeting you here." He said lamely as he laughed at himself nervously. I took a step to the side as Gaara-san moved his chair to face her completely. He hadn't even looked at me, and for some reason that made me feel miserable.


	7. The aftermath and what happened after

Chapter 7: The aftermath and what happen after that.

Shiya stared blankly at me before speaking. "Well, Gaara-sama, if this is a bad time I can come back later…" She started nervously, looking from me to Lee with a puzzled look on her face.

"No, it's okay, Shiya. What is it you wanted?" I asked, trying to keep my cool. I could still feel some left over heat on my face. What was that all about? What had just happened? My head was spinning and I tried to focus on Shiya so I wouldn't have to think about what I had just been feeling.

"I was just coming in to see if you needed anything and to thank you for letting me go yesterday, I feel much better." She said, giving me a warm smile. I knew what she meant; she didn't have to say anything aloud. She had talked with Kita and she had gotten a heavy burden off her chest. But I had wanted to know how it had all turned out. What was Kita's reaction? I wouldn't ask her right now, though; since it was obvious she wasn't comfortable sharing with Lee in the room. Oh, yes, I had almost forgotten that Lee had no idea who Shiya was and Shiya had no idea that this was Lee.

"I'm okay for right now, and I'm glad to hear you're feeling better. Though, I'd like you to bring me my coffee in a moment. But before that I'd like you too meet Lee." I said, motioning towards my left, where Lee was standing.

"This is Rock Lee of Konoha Village?" She asked, and I nodded. She smiled and walked over to him, extending her hand for him to shake. He reached out and lightly shook her hand, but before he smiled, I saw a look on his face that resembled one of pain and jealousy. But it was only there for an instant before he was giving her his token 'Nice guy' smile.

"Yes, I'm Lee. And I believe Gaara-san said you were Shiya? A pleasure meeting you," He said, dropping her hand. But he didn't look over at me and I felt a jealous feeling of my own. We hadn't made eye contact since… and it was starting to bother me.

"Lee-san here seems to be quite the charmer, Gaara-sama. You do have excellent taste." She said, turning to me as I looked away from Lee to look at her. She smiled but refrained from giggling. "Speaking of taste, I'll go get your coffee now, Gaara-sama. The new concoction, right?" She said, making her way back to the door. I nodded and she left, a satisfied smile on her face, and I wondered at that. The door was shut once again and I realized we were once again alone. She would be back in a few minutes but that was way too long for just an awkward silence. I didn't know what I was supposed to say after a moment like that. A moment that, when I thought about it, had been just that; a moment. But when I was there, and with him like that, it seemed it had lasted for much longer than it actually had. I was afraid to look at him, afraid of my reaction, afraid of his reaction. But the clock was ticking and awkward moments kept passing. I wanted to break the silence, but I felt too out of place. I wanted to turn to look at him, but my limbs seemed to be stuck, my mouth-sown shut, and my brain out of fuel. Just as I thought we'd never speak to each other and this was the end of something that was only beginning he broke the silence.

"Gaara-san, do you still hate me?" He said innocently enough, but his voice came out choked and he sounded like he was on the verge of breaking down. I felt tears quietly and swiftly sting my eyes, but they didn't fall out and I choked them back into myself. Why did he say that? Had I done something that made it seem like I hated him? Had I really ever hated him? Could I ever really hate him? I almost laughed at myself. Of course it had seemed like I had hated him, I had broken his limbs and tried to kill him. But that seemed ages ago to me. But to him… he was probably reliving those moments over and over again in his nightmares. After someone breaks your limbs you can never really trust them again completely, can you? I felt like crying and laughing at the same time but I did neither.

"No." I replied with as little emotion as possible after that long silence. The lack of emotion probably caused him more confusion and doubt, but I couldn't bring myself to show any emotion. Because if I was feeling anything right now, it was sadness. How could I have been so naive to think he'd just waltz in here and forgive me for all the terrible things I had done to him? How could I have ever thought that he could actually love me? No one really loved me; I was a monster, an abomination.

"That's good Gaara-san, because…" He started, and paused to choke back his own tears. And it almost sounded like he was already crying. "Because, Gaara-san, Because I…" I heard him sniffle, "Love you." He finally choked out and I turned to see him, as he stood there, crying. It was a pathetic sight, he had to be at least a foot taller than me and here he was, crying like a little boy. All because he loved me. And he was standing there, crying, a smile still on his lips; all because he loved me and thought I hated him. I couldn't think anymore, I couldn't sit still anymore, and I couldn't ignore my feelings anymore. I felt as if I flew from that chair as I desperately ran the few steps from it to his arms. I ran into his chest head first and almost knocked him over, but he didn't fall. I wrapped my arms tightly around his waist and felt my long overdue tears escape me. And as I felt his arms wrap around me, I leaned into him, wanting to be closer to him, but already as close to him as I could possibly be. I quietly thanked him in my head for being so strong, because right now, I was holding him as tight as I could and he didn't even flinch. I could hear him as he cried, and I bet he still had that dopey smile on his face. But I loved him for it and I stood there, letting my tears stain his clothes. He stopped crying long before I did, but as the last of my tears flowed from my eyes I felt a hundred times better. And, on top of that, I felt a hundred times better because he was here, helping me through it all, loving me through it all. I stayed there, not wanting to let him go. Not wanting to move. He was holding me as I was holding him, and the feeling that was pumping into me made me feel on top of the world.

"Feeling better, Gaara-san?" Lee asked and I meekly nodded, my face rubbing up against his chest as I did so. And I knew I was going to have to move away from him any moment now, but I wanted to enjoy being so close to him while I could.

"Well, Shiya-san brought your coffee in, if you'd like to have some now." He said. I had forgotten all about Shiya and the coffee. Had she seen me like that? I almost panicked, but remembered that Shiya had shared her secrets with me, she trusted me. And it was the least I could do to trust her. So I reluctantly let go of Lee as he let go of me. We looked at each other and smiled, both of us knowing that this was still just the beginning, but oh, what a beginning it was.

I walked over to my desk, where the now cold coffee was sitting. I picked it up and took a long drink from it. "Oh, it's cold now, isn't it? I'm sorry, Gaara-san, I should have told you sooner." Lee said, giving me a shy smile, notifying me that he hadn't wanted to let go of me either, and that's why he hadn't told me earlier.

"It's okay, Lee. It tastes better cold, anyway." I said, giving him a warm smile.

"Really? I've never had coffee before so I wouldn't know. Gai-sensei always prohibited it because he said it would stunt my growth and affect my training." He said, stepping closer, looming over me and staring into the contents that were in the mug in my hand.

"Well, this isn't your usual coffee. There's a bunch of different creamers and sweet tastes combined in it. Something of Shiya's creation." I said smiling. "I've been drinking it as of late." I looked at him but he had a slight frown placed on his features.

"I've been meaning to ask about Shiya-san. Does she, you know, like you?" He said, a bit of jealousy in his voice. I chuckled and he just gave me a bewildered look.

"Well, she _likes_ me, Lee." I said, looking up at him and smiling. "But you see, she prefers women, if you know what I mean." I saw him smile in relief, which made me smile in return. I took another swig of my coffee and then offered some to Lee.

"Would you like to try some? Don't worry; I don't believe I have cooties." I said, almost laughing. He just gave me a wide grin.

"If you had cooties I think I'd have already contracted them from earlier." He said, putting his finger to his lips, and we both knew what he was talking about, which made us both laugh heartedly.

"You know how long it's been since I've laughed like that?" I asked him, not expecting an answer.

"You've laughed before now? Wow, one more thing I've learned about you today." He said jokingly, taking the coffee mug away from me.

"So you're going to try it?" I asked.

"Yep, it can't be too bad if it's what you drink." He said merrily as he brought the mug to his lips and took a swig. He gave me a weird look. "Yuck, it's disgusting, Gaara-san!"


	8. A lovely rendezvous for two Part I

Chapter 8: A lovely rendezvous for two. Part I

"So, Lee, would you like a tour of the village?" I said as I placed my empty mug down on my desk. I tuned to face him, a smile playing on my lips.

"When? With who?" He said, confused, thinking it was like one of those tours you take at the zoo.

"Now, with me, of course." I said, walking towards my room to get some shoes.

"But, don't you have to stay here? Are you allowed to just leave? You're the Kazekage!" He said, still confused.

"I can leave if I really want to, and I've already finished the paperwork for today anyway. So, do you want to go or not?" I said, turning to face him, placing a hand on my hip.

"If you don't mind, Gaara-san." He said meekly.

"Of course I don't mind. I'm tired of sitting up in this stuffy office all the time." I said, sitting on my bed to put on my shoes. "It's good to get out once in awhile, and I haven't been out of this place just for the hell of it in a long time." I said, trying to recall the last time I had actually gone out. I couldn't remember and gave up on trying to. I got up and walked over to Lee, feeling short standing so close to him.

"You need to do anything before we leave?" I asked, now wanting to leave this place as soon as possible.

"Nothing in particular…" He said, leaning down to kiss my forehead. "So let's go." He said, pulling away from me and smiling. It felt strange, almost surreal, having someone care about me like he did. I mean, a lot of people cared about me, but with him, it just felt more intimate and special.

"First I'll notify Shiya that I'm leaving and then we'll be off." I said, walking towards the front desk, Lee following me. He looked more like my bodyguard than my boyfriend, which was good; it'll arouse less suspicion. As we walked up to Shiya's desk she gave us a warm, knowing smile. But even though she knew, she didn't say anything.

"Going out, Gaara-sama?" She asked, acting as if she hadn't walked in on us making out, and I thanked her for it. The last thing I needed was for her to blurt everything out in front of the group of people in here.

"Yes, it is alright, isn't it?" I asked, knowing I would leave either way. I looked around and spotted a clock. Only 10 am, it wouldn't be too hot out yet.

"Of course it is. Have fun, Gaara-sama." She said, winking. I looked around to see if anyone had noticed but the only person paying attention to our conversation was Lee, and he just stood there smiling. I nodded towards Shiya, instead of waving. She just smiled and watched as myself and Lee left.

"So Lee, where would you like to go first?" I asked, ignoring all the stares. All the townspeople were either bowing or freaking out as I passed by. I decided ignoring them was the best solution.

"Well…" He said, actually stopping to think. I turned to look at him and as I did I heard his stomach growl loudly. "How about we get something to eat?" He said, chuckling.

"Fine." I said, facing forward again and sighing. Because A) I hadn't thought ahead. People were bound to ask questions, too many questions. Questions that'd make me feel too uncomfortable to answer. And B) I had no idea what restaurants were good or not. I never really ate much, and when I did the things I dined upon were strange, to say the least. So I checked the surroundings to find the nearest restaurant, hopefully it'd be a good one. The first place I saw had a sign that labeled it as 'Sunagakure's Finest,' how dull and uncreative. But it didn't look too bad and I decided to give it a try.

"Hey, Lee, how about we eat over there?" I asked, pointing towards the restaurant, which I probably should've done more inconspicuously. Now that I had caught the attention of the few surrounding villagers it was too late. They began whispering to each other, none of them bold enough to actually talk to me. I sighed once more at my villager's gossip before turning around to see Lee nod and lead the way into the small restaurant. The moment we came in there was more gossiping and greetings, I ignored both, smiling politely as we made our way to an open table. The restaurant was small but not crowded, and we found a small table to sit at easily. There were only two chairs facing each other at the table, which was perfect, I didn't want anyone trying to sit at our table if the restaurant suddenly got busy. No one would probably come near us, though, since the villagers are polite towards me but they have and always will fear me, which was how I had always liked it. But now it kind of made me feel a little bad, being feared by my own people. I quickly shook off the feeling as a waiter came to our table to get our order.

"Kazekage-sama, I'm delighted that you've chosen this restaurant to dine at. What can I get for you and your guest?" He said, smiling at me, which made it seem like he was ignoring Lee's presence but he wasn't, and his satisfied smile somewhat annoyed me.

"An order of whatever you have for the breakfast special and two glasses of water." I said, in a slightly harsh tone. I wanted him to leave, his very presence annoyed me.

"As you wish." He said leaving, the smirk on his face retreating. I smiled to myself at his grimace.

"Gaara-san, why did you only order one?" Lee said after the waiter left.

"I'm not very hungry, don't worry about it." I told him, and it was the truth. Have I eaten at all in the past couple of days? No, not really. I've lived off coffee for a while now. And yet I didn't feel hungry. Was that weird?

"But, Gaara-san, you need to eat. You haven't eaten at all today." He said, worry in his voice. I thought it was kind of attractive how he worried over me, and for a moment I considered telling him I hadn't eaten in almost a week. Just so I could see him worry over me. But I didn't. If I told him that he'd probably force me to eat.

"I'm fine, I had something to drink earlier." I said, looking past Lee to see the waiter coming over to us with our water.

"If you live off coffee you'll never grow taller, Gaara-san." Lee said, more concern in his voice. He was just so… dreamy? God, is that the word? I feel like a lovesick sap. Maybe that's what I've become…

"Do you have a problem with me being short?" I spat, trying to regain a little of my old personality. I felt like I was loosing myself to him, but it wasn't a bad feeling, just, different.

"No Gaara-san, I like you just the way you are." He said quietly, as the waiter came up to our table and set the drinks down. I wanted to prolong our conversation but not with this waiter here. He seemed to enjoy interrupting us, and he just radiated annoyance.

"Anything else before I go?" He asked, but with a slight tone of defiance in his voice. This one was brave; I gave him credit for that. If Lee hadn't been sitting across from me I might have broken one of the child's limbs off right then and there. But circumstances as they were, I let his impoliteness slide.

"Lee, would you like anything else?" I asked, happy to face away from the waiter.

"No, I'm fine." He said nervously, as if he was answering a question the determined whether he lived or died. I guessed he was uncomfortable here with all of the alien surroundings and nameless faces. A little homesick, maybe? I looked at him as he looked into my eyes, searching for something he could recognize. His nervousness seemed to recede as I gave him a small almost unnoticeable smile. I didn't want to give anything away to the waiter but Lee seemed to notice that and just repeated himself. "I'm fine."

The waiter stood there a moment, his suspicion of their relationship obvious. He finally nodded and retreated back to the kitchen.

"So you're really not going to eat anything, Gaara-san?" He asked. I just shook my head.

"It's okay, I'm fine just watching you eat." I said and when the waiter came back with Lee's food I was content just watching him eat. His boyish demeanor was very attractive, and instead of feeling hungry like I should've I felt replenished with just the sight of him.


	9. A lovely rendezvous for two Part II

Chapter 9: A lovely rendezvous for two. Part II

We walked aimlessly through town after that, enjoying each other's company. It became easier and easier to ignore the townspeople politely, yes, I can ignore people politely. It's a secret I'm not going to share with anyone just yet. Also, hiding in a crowd was usually one of my specialties, but with Lee I couldn't seem to slip away from anyone's attention. The man was dressed in bright green and orange, for crying out loud! Not that I didn't like Lee's form fitting outfit, it was just a bit bright. I liked Lee, but his choice in clothing was very…different. And it made him stand out. People also noticed his Konoha forehead protector that he chose to wear as a belt instead. From his garb it was already apparent that he wasn't from around here but when they saw that he was a ninja from a different village they became suspicious of his presence. I heard them mutter things like 'Is he a body guard for Kazekage-sama because someone is after his head?' or 'Is he here to inspect the village for some reason?' But the one that bugged me the most was 'He must be here visiting with the Kazekage-sama, they must be very close. I wonder what kind of relationship they have?' The last one was usually uttered by adolescent girls and was followed by high-pitched laughter or squeals. What has happened to the youth of today? I smiled to myself, realizing I had just used Lee's favorite word.

"Lee, would you mind if I bought you something else to wear? Something less… Vibrant?" I asked, turning to look at him. He frowned.

"But Gaara-san, Gai-sensei gave this to me. It's all I ever wear!" He said, resistance in his voice. I sighed, it's going to be hard convincing him to change into something else.

"Please?" I said softly, for I rarely ever used that word. And I only said it like this in desperate situations. "For me?" I said, feeling even less like myself. What was I going to do if being around him flipped my whole personality upside down?

"Well…" He said, looking down at me and biting his lip. I knew he couldn't resist me, and if there hadn't been so many people around he might have embraced me right then and there. "If that's really what you want, Gaara-san." He said, giving in to me. I knew by doing this I was tearing him away from his sensei but I didn't really care. I wanted Lee to care about me more than anything, more than anyone. Do I sound selfish? I guess that's how affection is. Such a strange and foreign emotion.

"Thank you, Lee. It means a lot to me." I said, and he blushed and placed his hand behind his head.

"It's nothing, Gaara-san. I'd do anything for you." He said quietly, so just I could hear. It was my turn to blush slightly as he smiled down at me. As he noticed I turned around to lead the way to the nearest clothing store. I walked fast, my heart beating with anticipation and adrenaline. I was going to get to dress Lee, well, pick out what he would wear. I thought of all the things I would want to see him in, the first one being nothing, which just made my blush turn a deeper shade of crimson. I spotted a medium sized shop with nice enough looking clothes and led the way in. The bell on the door jingled as we walked in, alerting the owners of the store that customers had arrived. A small old lady, who might have been hundreds of years old, if that was possible, almost immediately greeted us.

"Welcome!" She said, her voice loud and out of character. She adjusted her thick glasses to get a better look at us. "Oh, Kazekage-sama! Please, come in, come in! You may go through whatever you like!" She said, finally recognizing me. She grabbed my hand, really only being able to hold a few of my fingers, and showed me to the back of the store, where there was some really nice clothes, but they were all my size, not Lee's.

"Um, Miss?" I said and she turned around to look at me. "I'm not really here shopping for myself but for my friend here." I said, motioning to Lee, who was behind me, looking at the different clothes. Why had I addressed him as my 'friend'? What was I supposed to introduce him as?

"Oh, sorry!" She said, moving past me to get a better look at Lee. Noticing that he was too tall he kneeled down, so that he was still about a foot taller than the old woman but she could at least see him now. "Ah, a tall one, you've got here, Kazekage-sama. I wonder what I have here that will fit him…" She started, walking around Lee, as if checking him out. "Hrmmm…" She said, setting her chin on her hand. Just as it seemed she was going to announce a ground breaking idea a younger woman emerged from the door in very back of the store. She looked about 16 maybe 17, and she wore an apron full of needles and pins; which signified that she was the old woman's apprentice and made some of the clothes here. When she saw us from behind the cash register she gave a startled look and raced over to us, Lee and the old woman only now taking notice of her.

"Kazekage-sama, welcome!" She said, giving a polite bow before addressing the old woman. "Tsuna-san, shouldn't you have gotten me if you knew we were helping out the Kazekage-sama?" She said, in a loud whisper.

"Don't worry about it. Even if we were getting the Kazekage clothes I think I could handle it." She said in another loud whisper, giving the girl a confident wink. "But he's here to get clothes for this strapping young lad." She said, her voice now at its regular volume, and she tapped Lee's knee. "Stand up and show the girl your full height so she can find you something nice, eh?" The old lady chuckled as she stepped back. Lee stood and turned to the young girl, and I could've sworn I heard him sigh. But he smiled as he looked down at the girl, who might've been a few inches taller than myself. A foot, at most. She must've been tall for a woman.

"Oh wow, it's not often I meet men taller than myself." She said as she looked up to him, a dreamy look overcoming her features. I felt rage towards her, like I wanted claw her eyes out. Jealousy, maybe? No, I've never felt that emotion before. Well, not to this extent, and not over someone, no.

"Yeah, everyone say's I'm tall for my age." Lee said, trying to sound casual. He had no interest in the girl whatsoever but I didn't know that. I felt the burning fire of rage grow inside me. Was this what people called 'flirting'? Was this woman 'flirting' with my man? Was my man 'flirting' with this young hussy? Did I just call Lee 'my man'?

"Well, we'll see what we can find. What kind of clothes are you looking for? Anything in particular?" She said, still giving Lee that flirty girly smile. The old lady just chuckled again before leaving us to go through that door in the back of the store. I felt like killing some puppies, just to get some of this pent up rage out.

"No, not really." He said, looking back at me, a question in his eyes. But I didn't notice his look; I was too busy drilling holes into the back of the girl's head with my glares. He just gave me a knowing smile, shrugged, and faced the young woman again, who was grabbing some clothes off a rack. It was a pair of long tan cargo-like pants. She held them up to him, and as the back of her hand touched his hip I almost couldn't stop myself from ripping out her jugular vein.

"These should fit. But, pardon my asking, why would you want to change out of what you're wearing right now? I think green looks nice on you." She said, and again, if Lee hadn't been there I might have killed her ass right then and there. Lee turned to me again, and watched me glare at the young girl for a moment.

"The Kazekage over there requested that I change my clothes." He said, walking over to me as I looked away from the girl to look at him. "And if you wouldn't mind," He said, now standing right next to me, "Would you please stop flirting with me? I think the Kazekage's getting a bit jealous." He said, putting his arm around me and drawing me close. Not caring that he was giving away our relationship I put my arms around him and shot her a smug satisfied smile that said 'he's mine, bitch.'

"Oh, I'm sorry Kazekage-sama, I didn't realize he was your lover. Please forgive me." She said, bowing again. I let go of Lee and faced her. She had called him my 'lover' but I didn't care. I'd make him my lover soon enough.

"It's alright, please just help us find something else for him to wear." I said, somehow feeling ten times better than I had before. Like I had somehow beaten this woman in a kind of epic battle.

"Of course, Kazekage-sama! Anything in particular?" She asked, and I felt as if I had regained my power over the earth.

"Maybe something black?" I asked, more to Lee than to the woman.

"If that's what you want, Gaara-san." He said, smiling at my smile. But I knew that what he really wanted to wear was green. So I decided.

"How about black pants and a dark green top?" I said, now to the woman, who nodded meekly. She went to fetch a pair of long black slacks and large dark green tank top. I looked the clothes over and nodded. "Perfect, go put them on, Lee." I said, taking the clothes from the woman and handing them to Lee, who just nodded and smiled. He headed over to the changing room on the bottom right side of the store.

"You're lucky." The still nameless woman said to me.

"I know I am." I said as I smiled in Lee's direction. Feeling like this, feeling so different, it was actually kind of…nice. And as Lee emerged, his headband, jumpsuit, and legwarmers over his arm I heard myself let out a dreamy sigh. I almost wanted to slap myself for acting so girly but I couldn't bring myself to. He looked so nice, I felt like I needed him right then and there. Of course, that's how he made me feel a lot of the time, recently.

"That looks nice on you, would you like a bag for your other outfit?" She asked, moving to the cash register to grab a nice looking canvas shopping bag. Lee just nodded and took the bag from her, shoving his beloved jumpsuit and other belongings into it. He then turned to me and gave me a sly smile.

"So, Gaara, do you like this?" He said, motioning to himself. The use of my name, no suffixes, and his charming good looks had me tongue-tied. I gave a small nod as he came towards me. As he came up next to me he swiftly leaned down and kissed me. Taken back but full of passion I threw my arms around his neck and tried to deepen the kiss. But he quickly pulled away and smiled at my frown. "Not now." He whispered to me. I awoke from my daze of lust towards him and shook my head slightly.

"Uh, what do we owe you?" I asked the woman, turning to look at her. She just shook her head.

"It's nothing, I'm just glad to serve you, Kazekage-sama." She said, smiling as I gave her a bewildered look. Generosity was something I was getting used to, but this was honest. Not forced like with other people in this village. I quickly understood and smiled. I gave her a small wave as I led Lee out the door. Lee bowed to show his thanks and followed me out the door. The reason she'd been so kind was probably because she was one of _those_ girls. The ones who love seeing men with other men. As I said earlier, what has happened to the youth of today? As I thought this I also thought of what I might get to do with Lee later on. I shivered a little with anticipation as I blindly led Lee down the now bustling streets of Sunagakure. I guess hormones affect people in strange ways…

Just as I was thinking everything was going right and that I felt so happy I might just skip back to my bedroom with Lee following close behind the strangest thing happened. I felt as if someone was lifting me up and taking me away. But then I realized it was more than a feeling, it was an action. And it was actually happening, I was being taken away.


	10. Kidnapped? Wtf?

Lee's point of veiw for a chapter again! Thank you for reading and please review!

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Chapter 10: Kidnapped? Wtf?

Unable to stop it I watched as Gaara was taken away. Quickly realizing he was being kidnapped I followed the strange ninja who had Gaara in his arms. He was wearing all black, as average ninjas do, and a black hooded cape that hid all his features. Having to hold this canvas bag was slowing me down but I wasn't about to leave me jumpsuit anywhere. Luckily this ninja didn't seem to know where it was going, he was a fast ninja but it was almost as if he needed glasses. Maybe he had left his glasses at home? What kind of ninja would go off and kidnap the Kazekage with out his glasses? I watched as the ninja took Gaara deeper into the middle of nowhere. You'd think he'd realize I was following him but he didn't. With the strange desert air pushing against my skin as I ran I almost wanted to stop running. The sand made the skin on my face burn and now that I was wearing short sleeves the sun seemed to be striking my skin repeatedly. My mouth was dry and the ninja seemed to be disappearing into the haze of the heat. But I knew I couldn't give up, I never give up! And I'm definitely not going to give up when I'm saving Gaara. I could out run this ninja if I wanted to, but I didn't. I wanted to see where he was taking Gaara. Luckily it wasn't long before I spotted the cluster of trees the ninja must've been heading for. There must have been a village near this group of trees and the ninja was taking Gaara there. But why would he kidnap Gaara? Usually a job like this was done by at least three ninjas. And very skilled ninjas. If he was doing something like kidnapping the Kazekage all by himself then he must have been very skilled. I must save my energy in case I have to battle him to get Gaara back. But why wasn't Gaara struggling? Usually he would have killed anyone who'd dare to touch him. Had this ninja used some kind of poison or technique that made Gaara go unconscious? I might have my work cut out for me. Just as I was beginning to think that the cluster of trees in the distance was a mirage the ninja reached it and went in, and I followed close behind.

It was like a different world. We had been in the desert only moments ago and now we were in what seemed to be a dense forest with plenty of foliage. Instead of being hard and sandy the ground was now soft with green grass. I stopped admiring the area and refocused my attention to the ninja who had captured Gaara. I followed him until we reached a small clearing with a small shack like house. I watched as the ninja took Gaara into the house. Just as I was about to go over to the small shack to take a look inside the ninja emerged and looked around. He still had Gaara in his arms and he set him down so he was leaning against an old log. A few feet from where they were there was a small fire pit, and the ninja began to gather some small logs and brush to start a fire with. I jumped up into a nearby tree so I could get a better view and have a better hiding spot. But as I said, this ninja seemed near sighted or something, so I really didn't have to put much effort into hiding. I looked down at Gaara. He didn't have any marks on him. It just seemed like he was sleeping peacefully. But I knew Gaara didn't sleep much, and that the ninja must've used some kind of tranquilizer on him.

I looked around; I spotted the ninja grabbing firewood. I also saw that darkness was approaching fast. What time was it? How long had I been following this ninja? The ninja laid the firewood down in the pit, but before he lit it he went inside to get something. I waited, I could've just taken Gaara and ran, but that wouldn't tell me why this ninja was doing this. The ninja came back out with a pot as large as Gaara, if not bigger! Was this ninja planning on eating Gaara? Was he one of those creeps who take joy in eating people? What were they called again…cannibals, that's right. How creepy! Gaara was abducted by a cannibal! I couldn't let this mad man eat Gaara!

I jumped out of the tree and swiftly came up behind the ninja, putting one of my kunai to his neck. It had been a bit more troublesome than usual to get my kunai out, since it was in the bag instead of attached to my leg. But I was skilled, so I managed.

"W-what?" The ninja stuttered as he dropped the cauldron-like pot. It didn't fall over, but fell upright, and I saw the already made vegetable soup in it. It was then that I noticed that this ninja was not a he, but a she. That took me by surprise and I almost forgot what I was in the middle of doing.

"Oh, right." I said, more to myself than to the ninja. "Who are you and why did you kidnap the Kazekage?" I said, putting my kunai against the ninja's neck. She was about half a foot sorter than me, a little taller than Gaara. How had she managed to carry him out all this way? She must've been a really strong ninja, and I didn't let her being female fool me.

"The Kazekage!" She said, her surprise honest, which made me pull my kunai away from her neck.

"Yeah. You didn't realize he was the Kazekage?" I ask, now backing away from her so she could turn to face me.

"Really?" She almost gasped. She looked at me and then turned to the unconscious Gaara. She walked over to him putting her face so close to his they were almost touching. "By god, you're right!" She said, her surprise still honest. "I didn't know the Kazekage was so…" She started, still in shock.

"Short?" I questioned, knowing that was the right word. She turned to me and nodded.

"Yeah… This is really him, ain't it? I'm in big trouble aren't I?" She said, looking at me and walking over to the pot. She picked it up as she sighed and placed it down over the firewood.

"Well, not really. I'm the only one who knows about this right now. No one suspects him to be gone just yet because he had notified them that he'd be gone all day." I said as I watched her light the fire and sit on the log next to the knocked out Gaara.

"Really? This was all a big mistake, you've got to believe me!" She said, looking up at me. I decided to sit down on the log on the other side of Gaara.

"Well, first off, who are you?" I asked. I believed her, it didn't seem like she had really meant to do anything to Gaara, or even kidnap him in the first place. What had she been trying to do?

"I'm Nina, the near-sighted ninja!" She proclaimed, striking an odd heroic pose. "Though, I haven't been quite the ninja I used to be. Ever since I broke my glasses." She admitted, pulling out an old pair of large broken glasses from her pocket. "I'm practically blind without them."

"Then why don't you get them fixed?" I asked. That explained why she had seemed so clumsy.

"Don't have the money. I was trying to find my brother, who was trying to find a glasses repair shop that'd fix them for free. I told him to give up but he was determined to find someone who'd fix my glasses. That was 3 months ago. I haven't been able to find him since." She said sadly, tears welling in her eyes. I was already crying twin rivers of tears for her.

"It's okay, Nina-san! I'll help you find your brother!" I said, striking a heroic pose of my own.

"No, it's alright, I'm sure I'll find him someday!" She said, standing next to me, tears also streaming down her face.

"No, we'll find him together!" I said, grabbing her hand and giving her a serious look. I had almost forgotten about Gaara, until I noticed he was on the ground between us. "Oh no! We knocked over Gaara-san!" I said, leaning down to sit him back upright.

"Oh shit! I forgot about the stew!" She said, going over to the now overflowing pot of stew. She got a little too close than she should have though, and some of the hot liquid bubbled over onto her. That caused her to turn around, which lead to the back of her cloak catching fire, which lead to much, much screaming.

"Stop drop and roll, Nina-san! Stop drop and roll!" I yelled. She took my advice and tried, but it didn't work and she was still on fire.

"It's not working! What do I do? What do I do?" She screamed, standing up and running in circle in place, putting her hands on her head.

"Take off the cloak, Nina-san!" I yelled, and she looked at me.

"Good idea!" She said as she untied it and got it off as quick as she could. Both of us then ran over to the cloak and stomped on it until the fire was put out. We then sighed in unison and wiped our foreheads with the back of our arms. Looking up at each other we laughed, the stew still bubbling over in the background. I now looked a Nina, her cloak gone and her features slouched in relief. She had a great figure, I had to give her that, and her hair was a very pretty light brown, almost red-orange. Without the hood to keep it back it fell around her face, and it reached all the way down to her hips. She sighed and looked up at me.

"Thanks!" She said, picking up her now charred cloak as I got off it. She turned away and went to put it inside. Deciding to do her a favor I picked the pot up by its handles and moved it off the fire. It was pretty heavy and I was amazed that she could move it with such ease. Not that it was hard for me to move it, it's just usually a girl isn't so strong. I admired her for that. She came out of the house with two bowls and a wooden ladle.

"You want some stew?" She asked, handing me a bowl as I nodded and smiled. "Oh, and thanks for moving the pot, I don't think either one of us wanted me to catch fire again." She smiled, but it was a sad smile. Like she was grieved at having to be helped by someone. I knew the feeling well. I had felt useless while my limbs were healing, but I'd always smile, as if that would make the pain go away. I wondered how she felt, barely even able to see. She must've been a great ninja long ago, but now she was just a clumsy woman who could barely see past her own nose. I wondered how old she was. She couldn't be too much older than Gaara or myself. As I was thinking she poured herself some of the sweet smelling stew and then poured me some.

"I had hoped I'd finally found my brother." She said before she sighed.

"Why do you say that?" I asked, blowing on the soup to cool it down so I could take a drink.

"Well, because, this is the third time I've made a stupid mistake like this. I've mistaken at least two others for my brother and now the Kazekage! I'm a failure…to myself and my little brother." She said, looking into the distance, which must have been just a blurry haze of green to her.

"You're not a failure! At least you keep trying. Never give up!" I said as she turned to me and I smiled. "That's what I always say. And it's true, no matter how bad things look you shouldn't give up! If you keep trying I'm sure you'll find your brother." I said, and I finally got her to smile a bit.

"You really think so? I mean, how am I going to find him? I can barely see. The only thing I can recognize is his hair color. Which is the same as the Kazekage's. And all the other boys I've accidentally kidnapped." She said, sighing again. "If I could see I'd recognize him in an instant! He's got a very distinct scar on his left cheek. If only I could see!" She cried out.

"Have you tried asking around? Giving people descriptions and asking them if they've seen him?" I asked, trying to help her out a bit. I didn't like seeing people in distress.

"No, actually. I mean, who'd want to help me…" She started sadly.

"There are a lot of kind people in this world, Nina-san. You just have to find them! I'm sure that if you ask around, someone could probably tell you where your brother is. Maybe he's an apprentice, learning how to fix glasses so he can fix yours himself. And if you search for him long enough, I'm sure you'll find him!" I said, and she finally gave me a complete smile.

"You know what? You're right! I'll find my brother! And no more of this accidentally kidnapping people business. I'm going to rely on the kindness of my fellow man! I'm going to find my brother, even if I can't see too good!" She said, happiness back in her voice as she stuck another one of her odd heroic poses.

"That's the spirit!" I said, as I gave her one of my token nice guy poses. We looked at each other and laughed again. After I finished laughing I decided to eat some of the stew Nina made, which actually tasted pretty good.

"So, what did you use to get Gaara-san knocked out like this?" I said as we finished eating.

"Well, it's one of my own creations. I invented it to retrieve my brother but now I've been using it to accidentally kidnap people." She, giving a small chuckle at this. "Though, from the past couple times I've used it, I've found it has a major defect."

"What's that?" I asked, and for some reason she blushed at bit.

"Well, when I've returned the boys before, and when they awoke, it was the strangest thing, you see. They were all especially…" She said, now her face even more red.

"What?" I asked, now worried at what would happen to Gaara when he awoke. "What happens?"

"When he awakes he'll be very…" She paused to choke back some of her nervousness. "Well, needy." I gazed at her, still confused.

"What will he be in need of?" I asked, hoping it was something I could get for Gaara.

"It's not really like that…The Kazekage over there will be very…" She paused and gave me a look of complete seriousness. Like this was a life or death situation. I drew closer to make sure I didn't miss a word she said. But she only uttered one word. "Horny." I would've laughed but she was completely serious. I looked over at Gaara and then at her.

"Really?" I asked, now somewhat excited. But I couldn't let her know that, that'd make me seem creepy. She just solemnly nodded. I stopped myself from smiling, and I believed I had a small nosebleed.

I took Gaara into my arms, she had told me he'd probably wake up within the hour. When I left she waved goodbye and thanked me again. I just nodded and smiled, the small and seemingly helpless Gaara limp in my arms.

**EDIT **Celtic Warrior just informed me of what my subconcious did while I wasn't looking. The long lost brother in this chapter seems a lot like a certain red haired rurouni we all know and love. XD Woot for Kenshin's weird mention in my story. Oo My mind has a mind of it's own.


	11. When the plot dies just add smut!

**WARNING!** This chapter contians YAOI! Man on man action! If that's not what you want to see then go away right now! Run! But if that's what you've been waiting for then you've come to the right place. XD

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Chapter 11: When the plot starts to die just add smut!

I awoke to a strange and foreign sensation running ramped through my body. I couldn't recognize it at first and just clenched my teeth, trying to get some of the tension out. I finally became aware of my surroundings; I was lying in my bed. How had I gotten here? All I could remember was walking out of the clothing shop and then…? I couldn't care less right now; I just needed to know where Lee was. I quickly shot up, searching frantically for him. I saw him sitting on the edge of my bed, now looking at me because of my sudden movement.

"Oh good, you're awake." He said smiling. And I couldn't resist, it was as if that smile was an invitation. I crawled over to him and wrapped my arms around him, pushing myself against him. I started rubbing against him, almost like a cat does. I couldn't think straight, I could barely think at all. It was as if this feeling was a thick haze over my thoughts. It was then that I realized what I was feeling. Sexual tension. Too much for it to be possible, if you ask me. Lee put his arms around me and I stopped rubbing against him. I looked up at him and brought my lips to his. And before he even brought his tongue out I was opening my mouth, begging for him to enter. He was taking too long, going to slow. I broke away and moved so that I was straddling him. I placed myself up against him and whispered to him.

"Lee, get serious this instant." I said, almost panting, looking over his shoulder to make sure the door was closed. "I need you, right now." I said and with that he finally pushed me back into the bed. He kissed me hard, and I invited him into my mouth, where we played an arousing game of tonsil hockey. With the score four to two, Lee in the lead, my attention drifted and I began feeling up Lee. First I lifted the back of his shirt up, feeling the small of his back. When this didn't grab his attention I let my hands wander downwards. When my hands reached their destination I grabbed his ass, which finally got his attention. We let out twin moans of satisfaction as Lee broke away to catch his breath. I started playing with the waist of his pants.

"You know, I got these for you to wear but I think you'd look a lot better without them." I said, smiling at him as my hands made their way to his fly. He smiled at me, pulling at the bottom of my shirt.

"I think you were looking your best when I saw you this morning." He said his voice now husky with a certain edge to it. He almost ripped off my shirt, which distracted me from unbuttoning his pants. My arms now above my head he smiled down at me. He quickly leaned back down and started nipping at my neck, placing a few tiny love bites next to my overly sensitive ears. A small groan escaped me as he put his lips on the nape of my neck; testing the area he licked it, which made me bite my lip in anticipation. Just as I thought he was going to finally leave his mark he pulled away a bit, so his mouth was hovering over the spot.

"Can I leave a mark there?" He asked, and I became frustrated. Why did he have to ask? 'Just get on with it, I'm dying!' I wanted to scream, but I didn't.

"Yes, fine, hurry, do it!" I said, my voice coming our hoarse. He smiled and muttered something like 'okay' but I couldn't hear. I felt his teeth on my flesh and my pace quickened. My breathing became unsteady and I felt him bite down. Lightly at first but he bit down harder when I nudged his leg with my knee. He pulled back before he broke the skin but I was pretty sure there was a pretty nice mark there. After inspecting his work he continued to move his lips over my skin. As he was kissing my collarbone he dipped his tongue into the slight indent that was in the middle. My breath intake was too fast and I became light headed. I panted, trying to get myself to slow down. But all this did was make me want him more. Sensing my need he slowly moved his hands towards my groin, where he unbuttoned my pants. I kicked off my shoes as he pulled off my clothing, boxers and all. I laid under him naked for a moment as he was drinking in the sight of me. I saw him blush and smiled.

"It's no fair if I'm lying here naked and you're still fully clothed." I remarked, catching his attention again. He gave me a shy 'sorry' smile and quickly took off his shirt. He slipped off his shoes and looked at me again.

"Better?" He asked, smiling.

"It's okay, I'll get your pants off soon enough." I said, pulling him down towards me again, our lips quickly finding each other. His hands began to wander and he started feeling me up at my thighs. His hands skillfully moved upwards and his fingers touched my now exposed skin. He put his hands around my waist and moved me upwards so I was in the middle of the bed. His face now being level with my stomach I felt his hot breath on me, stimulating me. Instead of moving upwards, his hands moved back down. He put his thumbs on my hips and his figures lightly grabbed my ass. He shot me one last ultra sexy smile before moving his face down towards my groin. As soon as I felt that first hot breath on my crotch I knew I was being overcome by passion. He moved his lips so that they were touching the place right above it. I tensed up, not knowing what he was doing or what was coming next. This was the first time I'd ever done something like this. The first time I ever felt like this. And I was hoping it wasn't the last time.

"Lee?" I practically moaned. This grabbed his attention and he took his lips away from my hip, where they had been resting.

"Hmm?" He replied as he looked up at me. I turned away, looking towards the curtained window. I wanted to ask him to stay here with me, not just right now, but forever. I didn't say anything, though. I didn't want to make him stop. I didn't want this to stop. But most of all, I didn't want to ask him because I was afraid that he'd say he couldn't stay here. But in my subconscious, I knew he couldn't stay here. He'd have to go back to his village, and leave me here all alone again. But while he was here, and while things were going as they were, I wanted him to continue. At least I could be lonely with the memories.

"Nevermind." I almost sighed, but stopped myself. If I let on that I was feeling anxious then he'd stop, like the good guy he was. For once I cursed him for being the good guy. I just wanted him to fuck me and go. Because if he stayed too long, I'd never get over him leaving.

"You sure?" He asked, giving me a concerned look. He was just too cute, and too nice to be real, I swear.

"Well, it's just my first time doing anything like this…" I said quietly, readily making up excuses for my anxiety. He brought his face back up to mine, so he could look at me since my head was turned to the side. When I looked up at him he smiled.

"Mine, too. Are you sure this is what you want?" He asked, pushing my hair off of my face. It was a loving movement, and it comforted me. I nodded. Though I was surprised it was his first, also. Was he naturally this good at it?

"Is it what you want?" I asked hesitantly. He beamed at me and nodded.

"More than anything, I love you, Gaara." He said quietly, like it was a secret between us. Not like it had to be kept a secret, but it was a secret because of the intimacy. As he said it I threw my arms around him and brought him down on me. And my anxieties were washed away with an overwhelming feeling of passion. As our needy lips found each other we played another game of tonsil hockey, this time we didn't even bother to keep score. As we kissed I moved my hands over to his fly once more and began to unbutton and unzip his pants. After I did that I used my foot to push them off of him and onto the floor. We broke away; he smiled down at me as I took in the sight of him. He was so well built it was mind-boggling. He chuckled a bit and caught my attention. I had barely been aware of my staring, and now I looked up at him.

"Like what you see?" He said, half jokingly, but I took him seriously. I gave him a cunning smile and nodded. And I took advantage of him as he started chuckling again. I turned him over so that I was on top, which was odd, since I was so much smaller than him. He continued to giggle a little, looking at me and smiling.

"You're much to small to be on top, Gaara." He stated the obvious and I just smiled down at him. It's not that I wanted to be on top, it was more of I was tried of being under him. Trying to get comfortable I straddled him, our bodies touching now, no clothes to stand in our way. He tensed up for a moment and I ran my hands over his chest. Not knowing what I was doing, but doing what I felt as it came to me; I put my face in the crook of his neck. He relaxed under my touch and I gently licked his skin, testing it, as he had done to me. I wanted to leave a mark of my own. Not being the nice guy Lee was I didn't ask, I just bit down hard into his skin. Just before I thought I was going to break the skin I pulled away. I looked down at it and was thankful that it wasn't bleeding. It was a nice big hickey, and I estimated it'd stay there for maybe a week before fading. He reached his hand up and touched it. I did the same and reached up and felt the mark he had left one me.

"Now we match." I said quietly and he smiled. I put my face against his, my hands still resting on his shoulders. I put my lips next to his ear, and before I knew it I had placed my tongue inside his ear, which caused him to gasp.

"Gaara." He stuttered quietly, his breath uneven. Hearing him say my name like that pumped me up with an intense feeling of eagerness. I let my lips glide over his skin, going from his neck to his clavicle, then to his chest. Just as I started to nip at his tender flesh he took me by surprise and flipped me back over so that he was once again on top. I sighed and pouted at him. But when I looked up at him his face was a deep shade of crimson. After he wiped a bit of the saliva out of his ear he looked down at me, his nervousness showing.

"Are you…?" He started but I kissed him before he could finish.

"Sure." I said. He gave me a nervous smile before placing himself between my legs. Still not sure if what he was doing was right he leaned down and kissed me again for reassurance. After he broke away I smiled at him and he regained some of his lost confidence. He placed my legs on his shoulders, not wanting them to get in the way. Neither one of us really knew what we were doing, we were relying on instinct. I felt him hard against me and I felt my face heat up. I looked at him and he was completely flustered, his face an intense red and his movements jittery. He looked down at me, and as my smile reassured him once again, he smiled. And as he plunged into me I closed my eyes, not knowing if it hurt but I had been told it did. They hadn't lied, it hurt like a bitch, but the craze, the passion, the invigorating feeling it gave was too much and I let out a loud moan. I bit down on my lip hard, and panting we looked at each other. I hadn't meant to be so loud. What if someone heard me? But that wasn't very likely, even if people were still in the building. My chambers were large enough to engulf the sound, but I still worried.

He pushed into me a second time and I gasped in surprise. I bit down on my lip again, but I bit it too hard and I tasted blood. It wasn't much but it left a metallic taste in my mouth. He pulled out of me and looked down at me, out of breath. He panted for a moment before spotting my now bleeding bottom lip. Without saying anything he put my legs down again, falling next to me instead of on top of me. He pulled me to him with what little strength he had left. He brought his face to mine and licked the blood off my lips, sucking the bottom one until it stopped bleeding. After he was done he kissed me lightly. I wrapped my arms around him and held him as close as I could. I almost cried, out of joy, sadness, or pain I didn't know. I chocked back the tears and held him close as he lazily put his arms around me.

Neither one of us ready to speak yet I pulled the covers over us and we fell asleep in the comfort of one another's arms.


	12. The scars force us to remember

Chapter 12: The scars force us to remember.

I woke the next morning feeling sore but content. My arms were still around Lee but he had moved into a spread out position, his arms almost reaching from one side of the bed to the other. I smiled at this, but the smile didn't last long. He'd leave me today, and I couldn't let my emotions get the better of me. I wasn't that type of person. I looked at him again and tears welled up in my eyes. I quickly forced them back and decided to lie down again, leaving my arms around Lee. Not being able to go back to sleep I just stayed like that, trying not to think too much. It was awhile before Lee woke up, the first thing he did was yawn and stretch like a cat, forcing me to let go of him and move away. I sat up and he followed, looking at me and smiling, his hair crazily spread around his face.

"I didn't wake you, did I?" He asked me, giving me a half-there smile. I shook my head and looked down to make sure the blanket was covering me. I suddenly felt shy for some reason.

"Is everything alright?" He asked, placing one hand under my chin, turning me to face him. I nodded; I didn't want to say anything, because if I spoke I knew my voice would carry too much emotion. I didn't want to make him feel bad.

"Good." He said smiling, hugging me and pushing me back down onto the bed. Him being on top of me put me in the same position I had been in just last night.

"No, I'm still sore…" I mumbled, but he just rubbed his face against mine.

"But you're too cute, Gaara!" He pulled back to look at me. "But don't worry, I won't do anything if you don't want me to." And once again I was cursing him for being so nice. If he was mean maybe I could stand him leaving me but no, he had to be perfect. He had to be perfect and he had to love me. Maybe this is why people always say love hurts. I was about to wish that I'd never fallen in love in the first place. But that wasn't true. I'd rather have him love and leave me then never had loved me at all. Being the good guy he was he flopped back onto his side so that he wouldn't lie on top of me. He quickly turned onto his back and starred at the ceiling. I just looked at him, he seemed to be thinking about something but I didn't ask what. I poked at is forearms, which I just now noticed where still covered in those bandages of his.

"Why do you wear these all the time?" I asked; tempted to take them off so I could see the flesh they hid.

"Well, they're fashionable." He said, turning his head to look at me and smile.

"No, really." I said, turning onto my stomach. I continued to poke his arm, just for the hell of it.

"They also help protect my arms, especially while I'm training." He said, turning his head back to face the ceiling.

"So is it okay for me to take them off?" I asked, messing with the part around his fingers.

"I guess…" He said hesitantly. I started with his fingers, slowly unraveling it and folding it up to put aside. Once I had completely uncovered his hand I looked at it. It was covered in scars, some old and fading some looking fresh and angry. None of them were bigger than an inch, but they were almost everywhere.

"What happened here?" I said, holding his hand as if it could break any second. But from all the cuts it had endured I knew it was too strong to break anytime soon.

"Training." He said simply, his mind wandering elsewhere. I put my own right hand to his; his was much bigger than mine. He suddenly curled his fingers over my hand and held it in his. My hand may have been much smaller, but it fit into his perfectly. Seeing his scared hand hold my deathly pale one made my heart flip. It was too good to be true, having someone love me like he did. And I knew that it wouldn't last, he'd leave and things would have to resume to how they had always been. But while he was here I wanted to savor it.

"Why do you try so hard?" I asked. But what I really wanted to know was _how_ he tries so hard. How does he keep himself going? How does he stay smiling? When all this must have caused him great pain he just shrugged it off. Like pain was nothing to him.

"Why? Well, because I want to become strong." He said, turning to face me again, looking at me, still holding my hand in his.

"But why do you have to be so strong?" I thoughtlessly asked. Everyone wanted to become stronger. It was in our nature. Everyone has their own reasons.

"To prove myself. And to protect the ones I love." He said, smiling at me. His statement was so cliché it was almost sarcastic. But for him, that was his reason. He was my cliché knight in shinning armor, and I don't care how cliché that sounds.

"Does that include me?" I teased. He laughed at little.

"No." He said, giving me a mocking smile.

"Why not?" I said, giving him an overly dramatic frown, which caused us both to smile.

"Because you're stronger than I am." He said, his smile still there. His smile seemed endless sometimes, like it wouldn't fade no matter what. Then I remembered, the hand that was holding mine was attached to his once broken arm. The arm I had broken. I took my hand away from his and began to quickly unwrap the bandages around his arm.

I took a sharp inhale, almost a gasp but not. There were scars and cuts a plenty. But looming under them, like a sea monster under tiny fishing boats, was a massive scar. Lee tensed up when I touched it, but I had to see it, I had too look at it all. I lifted his arm, seeing the scar was on the under part of his arm, too. It was a purplish color, I could tell it had healed, but that there was always going to be marks there. And the person responsible for this scar was none other than myself. I moved onto my side so I could hold the arm to myself without putting too much pressure on it.

"Is it like this on your leg, too?" I asked, too afraid to check myself. In the haze of passion that was last night I couldn't remember ever getting a good look at his left leg. He nodded.

"Yes, Gaara-san, but it's alrigh…" He started, but stopped when he looked at my face. I knew I must've been quite the sight, tears almost daring to fall as I bit my already swollen bottom lip, trying to choke back the tears. Instead of saying anything more he just took his arm out of my grasp and used it to hold me instead. He kept me in a tight embrace as I fought against my tears. He had added the suffix to my name again; he must've been scared of what I would do. Even though he was so close to me I felt the distance growing between us already.

"You're stronger than I am." I finally choked out. I had scarred him so badly, broken his left arm and leg, yet somehow he managed to carry on. That made him stronger then I'd ever be. He just shushed me like it didn't matter and held me close. I swore I wouldn't cry but one tear escaped and fell onto him, but he ignored it. He was too good. Too good for me. I didn't deserve his love. No matter how much I wished I did.

"Let me get up." I finally said after I knew I wasn't going to cry. He quickly let me go so I could sit up and get to the edge of the bed.

"Is something the matter?" He asked, coming to sit next to me. I shook my head.

"No, I'm just going to get dressed." I said, reaching for my boxers on the floor. I put them on, and as I stood up I felt a sharp pain in my ass. "Ow…" I said under my breath as I got up slowly. I tried walking normally, but it hurt too much so I sort of limped over to my closet.

"Did I hurt you that much, Gaara-san?" He said as he put on his own boxers and pants. "Sorry." He said, coming over to help me.

"No, it's okay. I got it." I said and he shrugged, going back over to grab the shirt I had gotten him. I grabbed a black t-shit and pants. I slipped the shirt on and very carefully put the pants on, trying not to make it hurt even more.

"You wear a lot of black, Gaara-san." He said, looking at me, walking towards me.

"I guess." I think most of my clothes are black, maybe all of them. Maybe that said something about my personality, I didn't care. I hesitantly walked back over to the bed.

"You want some help?" He asked, ready to pick me up. I quickly replied no. Because I was going to need to get used to doing things on my own again.


	13. When you leave please don't say goodbye

Chapter 13: When you leave please don't say goodbye.

After I had carefully wrapped Lee's arm back up I sighed and looked towards my window. Light was trying to enter the room though the curtains. I guessed it couldn't be earlier than 8 or 9 am, but not later than noon.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" He asked, his concern now tasting bitter sweet to me.

"I'm alright." I said, trying to fake at least the tiniest bit of happiness. At this rate I'd be back to my old uncaring self sooner then I thought possible. I guess that is what happiness is, something that comes and goes. It was like a light breeze in the desert, cooling you down for the moment but when it stops it leaves you hotter than before. But I didn't even feel warm inside; I felt no warmth at all. Not even when Lee held me close. I'd already frozen my heart over, hiding it away, under ice so thick that no one could melt it; no matter how hard they tried.

"How about we get some breakfast?" He asked, trying to cheer me up. He failed, of course. Right now I felt as if I'd never be happy again. I made myself act like he'd already left. Because once he went on his way, I couldn't stop him, nor did I want to stop him. I made a promise to myself to never feel this way again.

"No thanks, I'm not hungry." I said, deciding that being cold towards him was okay. Since he'd have to leave soon anyway.

"But Gaara-san, you didn't eat all day yesterday or today! Are you sure you're feeling okay?" He said, his concern a sick joke to me now.

"I'm fine." I said coldly. It wasn't food that I needed. And love couldn't help me now. I needed my solitude. It had always been there for and always would. Solitude never leaves you, you leave it. But in the end it's always there, waiting for you to come back, because it knows you will.

"Are you sure? You're looking a little pale." He said, approaching me, but I stepped away.

"I'm naturally pale." I said, ignoring the harsh pain in my ass. "And I'm sure. If you want to you can go get breakfast for yourself. I can tell you where to go…" I started but he started shaking his head.

"No, I'm fine. I was just worried about you." He said, his kindness feeling old and it didn't comfort me anymore. Because I knew that this was all temporary, almost fake. He seemed so kind right now, but I knew that it wouldn't seem that way after he left. He would have broken my heart, if I hadn't already locked it away.

I was too caught up in my thoughts to notice Lee come up to me and I saw him after he put his hands on my shoulders. I looked up at him, ridding my face of any emotion.

"You feeling alright? Anything I can do?" He asked, giving me a worried frown as he checked my face, as if I might have a deadly disease.

"No." I replied, answering both questions. Because I wasn't really feeling all right, but there was nothing he could do about it. If I told him that his leaving was what was making me like this then he would have insisted on staying. But he would have to leave at some point in time, and I knew that. So the sooner he left, the sooner I could let go. I didn't want to forget him, no, I'd remember this all forever. But I knew he couldn't become a part of my future, he had his own life to pursue, and I didn't want to hold him back. He'd become my most cherished memory, but nothing more. Because that's how things had to be.

At first he just looked at me, puzzled. But after a moment he gave me a look of understanding. I didn't think he'd actually understood what I wasn't saying but I kind of hoped he did. Maybe he could read minds… No, how silly that sounds! But he still smiled at me, and I felt the ice melt away a little, but just a little. If he could stay forever, smile at me like that forever, then I'm sure he could've won my heart over. But he didn't have forever, and he couldn't win my heart over, because it was time to move on, for the both of us.

"Gaara-san, I know I'm supposed to leave today, but I really don't want…" He started, but I interrupted. I didn't want him to leave, he understood that much. But I had to get him to leave now, because never was not an option.

"Lee, you are going to leave today." I said, my voice free of any emotion. It almost had a touch of superiority in it.

"But, Gaara-san, I …" He tried again, but I quickly shot him down.

"No, you must leave today. That's how it is. You…" I started, but this time he interrupted me.

"No, Gaara-san, you need to listen! I don't care about anything else, I'm staying, and…" He'd almost gotten me, I almost gave in to him but I stopped him once again.

"No, Lee, you don't understand. You staying here is not an option. You must part with me today, go back home. Your village eagerly awaits you." I said and his head fell and he looked down at the floor, his hands still on my shoulders. If I had had to say this an hour ago I couldn't have. But I've made up my mind, thrown away my feelings, my emotions, and I've chosen to deny him and any of his requests to stay here. He stayed like that a moment, and I started to wonder if he might've been crying. But his head quickly shot up and he looked at me, tears in his eyes but he didn't let them fall.

"I told you, I don't care about anyone else, and I just want to stay…" He tried again, his voice almost breaking, his tears daring to go against his will and fall. I didn't have to interrupt him this time, he stopped on his own.

"You do care for others, and you know it. Don't throw away your life for me, in a moment of passion. You need to get back home. You'll have to leave soon to get back before dark." I said, my face and voice giving him no comfort, if anything, they were disturbing him.

"But…" He started, but searching my eyes for any signs of affection and finding none he stopped again. "Gaara-san," He said sadly, taking his hands off of me and standing up straight, "If that's what you really want, then I'll leave."

"It's for the best." I reassured him, and myself. He smiled, but it was full of sadness and painful to look at. I didn't want to see him like this, but there was no other way.

"Before I leave, I want you to know something." He said, the pain and sadness in his face distorting and turning into a look of pride. "I love you, and I probably always will. I might be leaving you, but only because you wish it so. The next time I see you, I will surely make you fall in love with me." He finished, giving me one last true smile.

He turned to leave, walk out of the door and out of my life, but suddenly he turned back around and came towards me. He was openly crying now and didn't bother trying to hide it. He embraced me, holding me as close and tight as he could. I thought he was going to squeeze the life out of me, for an instant. I didn't dare return his embrace, because if I did I'm sure I would've never let go. His tears fell onto my shoulder, and he whispered under his sobs, "I'll miss you." After saying that he let go, trying to smile for me but failing. He nodded me goodbye, and I politely nodded to him. He left.

It was then I fell to my knees and cried rivers of silent tears. Because even icebergs melt when placed next to the blazing radiance of the sun.


	14. Just when you thought he was gone

I'm sorry if this chapter seems very...well, out of place. ' I can't stand angst, so this is very humorous. I had fun, so, sorry if you don't like it.

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Chapter 14: Just when you thought he was gone… 

I was once again left alone. I hadn't been so bad before, since I had never known company like his. But now it just seemed as if something was out of place, a piece of me missing. I sighed again, I know I had said all those things about it being for the better and he was apart of my past, but I didn't really mean any of it and I knew that. If he hadn't left the instant he did I would have never let him go, forcing him to stay with me. Making it okay for him to stay here, because what was the point of being the Kazekage if I couldn't make things go my way? But he had left, and if I bring myself to think about it, it was for the better. Everything would have gotten too complicated if he had stayed.

But I still longed for him. I wondered if he longed for me, remembering what he had said just before he left. He'd make me fall in love with him? Didn't he realize that that was what was wrong with me? I'm so lovesick I'm becoming physically ill. He had turned my world upside down, and it was hard getting it to go back to the way it was before. He had only been here a day and a night, but it had seemed much longer. The time we spent together appeared to be longer then it actually was, but actually went by faster. It had only been two days since he left, but I was already going insane. Other than paperwork and mediocre tasks there wasn't much to do, and I couldn't sleep. I'd finally eaten, but the food seemed to have no taste, all my feelings numb to me now.

I had limped around the first day and a half, my ass still sore. I told anyone who asked that I had fallen. But now that the pain was gone, what was there to physically remind me of him? I touched my collarbone, the actual flesh hidden under my shirt. I went from my office to my bathroom, to check for it. I'd changed and bathed in the past days but I hadn't taken a good look in the mirror. Pulling down the collar of my shirt down I saw the mark there. His mark. It was very noticeable, the red mark on my pale skin. I'm glad that my shirts had covered it. If anyone had seen it… Well, it would have been awkward. I smiled, the first real smile I had had since he left.

I wondered about the mark I had left on him. It was surely still there. When would it fade away? When would his fade? I took a closer look at my neck in the mirror and saw, if I looked real hard, some of his small love bites were still there. It brought me joy for a moment, making me feel like he was here again. But the happiness left me promptly, and my smile faded away into a small frown once again. I let go of my collar and let my shirt cover his mark again. He wasn't here, and he could never come here again…

"**What makes you say that?" **

Shukaku! It's been awhile, hasn't it?

**"Eleven chapters, to be exact."**

Chapters? What are you talking about?

**"Oh, I forgot, sorry. The fourth wall is a mere plaything to me."**

Whatever… Shukaku had and always would confuse me with his twisted sense of humor.

**"I may have a twisted sense of humor but at least I'm not moping around the place like some little Kazekage I know."**

Well, you know why I'm depressed. What do you suggest I do?

**"Coming to me for advice now? Finally, you listen to me. Just so you know, I'm a lot wiser than I let on."**

Just hurry up and give me some of your 'wise' insight.

**"Fine! You don't have to be so impatient, I haven't been around in awhile, and I want to get some dialogue in."**

Shukaku!

**"Okay, I get it! I don't see why the boy can't come to visit. Who says long distance relationships always fail?" He held back his laughter. This whole situation seemed to be a kind of joke to him.**

Yeah, but if he came over he'd just have to leave again. He'd come and go, and I'd be interrupting his life. Also, seeing him leave over and over again would just hurt me more and more.

**"You really are a downer, you know that? Also, if you didn't notice, to the boy, you _are_ his life. So don't take 'interrupting his life' into account."**

What makes you say that?

**"He practically proclaimed that you were his 'everything.'" He stopped himself from retching. "So I don't see why you have to keep turning away his affection."**

I'm not 'turning away his affection'! I'm simply doing what's best for the both of us. I think…

**"You shouldn't think too much, it isn't your strong point. Just sit there and look pretty." He chuckled.**

One of these days I'm going to learn how to smack you without hurting myself.

**"Threatening me now! I guess you don't want any more of my suggestions, then?"**

I don't know if it's worth hearing you badmouth me so much.

**"Oh, well then. I guess I just won't tell you my next idea. And this idea was great, I'll tell you that much."**

Just spit it out, Shukaku.

**"Now I'm not in the mood…"**

Okay, okay, I'm sorry Shukaku. I should be nicer to you…

**"And?"**

And what?

**"Say it! You know what I'm talking about, don't lie."**

You want me to say that? Aloud?

**"Yes! What are you worried about? You're in your bathroom, who's going to hear you?"**

Well, I guess… If I do it you're going to tell me that ingenious plan of yours?

**"Maybe… Whatever, just do it and we'll see."**

Promise you'll tell me!

**"Wow, you must be more desperate for the boy than I thought. Okay, I'll tell you, I promise."**

Good, it's a deal then.

I paused, not ready to do this. It was embarrassing, even if I knew no one could hear me. I gathered my breath.

"Shukaku's the coolest raccoon ever and I want to have his man babies." I said, quietly, to myself.

**"Louder! I didn't hear you!"**

You live in my head, you always hear me.

**"Did you not hear me? Say it louder! Say it like you mean it!" He started laughing already.**

"SHUKAKU'S THE COOLEST RACCON EVER AND I WANT TO HAVE HIS MAN BABIES!" I said, my yell angry, but loud enough I could hear it even over Shukaku's laughing. He just continued laughing, louder now, like he might explode or at least have his appendix burst. If he had an appendix of his own to burst.

**"…Aahahahahahaha…haaa. That was priceless. Kodak moment, one for the photo albums."**

So what's this great idea of yours? Doing that just made me want to see Lee more.

**"Ah, so you want to have _his _man babies?" He laughed again.**

I didn't say that! Now my face is red, thanks a lot.

**"You took it seriously? You're sick." He chuckled a little; he was all out of laughter.**

Tell me!

**"Oh, but why right now? I said I'd tell you but I didn't specify when."**

You! You know I meant right now! Just tell me! I held up my part of the bargain now it's your turn!

**"But that wasn't part of our agreement. I agreed to tell you, not right now, though. Maybe tomorrow."**

I'd kill you if I didn't have to kill myself to do that. I'm so depressed I just might…

**"Oh be quiet. I'll tell you tomorrow, you can wait that long. 'Night."**

But, Shukaku! Shukaku? It was no use; he wouldn't talk to me now. Why'd he say 'night'? It was barely 3 in the afternoon. Argh! Why did he have to be so difficult?

I looked in the mirror again, pulling down my shirt to see his mark again. I could wait until tomorrow. Shukaku might be sarcastic and mean but I knew he was smart. His idea was probably worth the wait.

I made my way back to my office and sat at my desk. Thumbing through my paper work I was surprised to hear someone knock on my door.

"Come in!" I called. Who could it be? Shiya had been given a week of paid vacation. Mostly because I didn't want her telling everyone about Lee. And the rest of my employees were too scared to knock on my door. The door opened, fast and dramatically. And there stood…

"Hey, little brother!" Temari greeted me, smiling. Kankuro was behind her, practically snickering. I'd forgotten today was the day they got back from their mission.


	15. If you were gay

Chapter 15: If you were gay…

I laughed nervously at their smiles. Why now? Well, at least they didn't come back while Lee was here, that would've been a major fiasco. They gave me a questioning look, as if I might have been hiding something. What did I have to hide from them? Other than the fact that I wasn't a virgin any longer and I had a huge hicky on my neck. I had nothing to hide. I felt a small cold sweat break out on the back of my neck.

"Have fun?" I asked, my voice coming out smooth and even, but I was definitely not feeling calm. At least I knew how to hide it well. Or maybe not, was I hiding it well? They still seemed suspicious…

"I guess you could call it fun. More like boring and tedious, so much so that it drives you insane, yeah. If that's your idea of fun, then it was a lot of fun." Temari said, giving me a sarcastic glare.

"So, how was it here without us? You get lonely?" Kankuro said, just as sarcastically as Temari had said her remark. We are a very sarcastic family.

"It was peaceful, to say the least." I said, smiling, trying to get them angry. We all took delight in teasing each other. Isn't that how it is with all siblings?

"You were bored out of your mind, admit it. Stuck up here in this little office of yours doing nothing but paper work all day. The glamorous lifestyle of the Kazekage, my little brother." Temari said, almost laughing aloud.

"Yeah, it might've been boring but at least you two weren't here to annoy me to death." I said, not really meaning it. But it's fun to mess with family. I was careful not to say anything that might make them suspect I had had company, so I went along with the charade that I had spent the entire two weeks they were gone up here in my office.

"Nice thing to say about your relatives. You're so nice to us." Kankuro said, faking that he was hurt by my comment.

"I try." I said, smiling. We all laughed for a moment at each other, because we knew none of us really meant the hurtful things we said to each other.

"So you really spent two weeks doing little to nothing?" Temari asked, looking around my office as if she'd find evidence of me doing something.

"I spend my life doing little to nothing these days, you know that." I said, almost frowning. My life really was boring. Other than what had happened a couple days ago…

"How can you stand it? I mean, it's not like you're locked up in here, you could go do something if you really wanted to." Temari said while Kankuro just stood there. She usually did most of the talking for all three of us.

"I guess I could, but why would I bother? Just roaming around the city isn't an option; I could get kidnapped, raped, killed, or worse, harassed by the bothersome townspeople who all freak out whenever they seem me." I said, smirking.

"True." Kankuro said, laughing a little at my remark about the townspeople. "So what do you do? You can't sit there and do nothing everyday."

"That's exactly what I do." I replied.

"You're pathetic, little brother. Why don't you find a girlfriend or something? You're getting older; you should actually be looking for a lifetime partner. So you can keep the bloodline going." She said, and I almost let them see me blush. But I didn't, I had to stay composed. I didn't want them to know I had already found a potential lifetime partner.

"Why do I have to? You two can keep the family going yourselves. I don't want to worry about that kind of stuff." I said, and they just looked at me to check if I was serious. When they saw I was they laughed.

"You sound like a little kid. Do you think girls still have cooties or something?" Temari said between laughs.

"Afraid of girls? Don't tell us you're gay." Kankuro added, laughing even more. I didn't answer; they wouldn't have heard anything over their laughter anyway.

"Gay? My little brother?" Temari said laughing. She turned to Kankuro, "Oh, you know what would be funnier?" Kankuro continued to snicker and shook his head. "You remember the boy with the brushy eyebrows?" Kankuro nodded, and I held my breath. What? Did they suspect our relationship? No… "Those two." She said pointing to me, and they both broke into another fit of laughter. If they had been paying attention they would have seen how nervous I was, but they didn't. I realized that was all a joke to them and tried to laugh with them, to cover myself.

"Okay, I was offended when you said I might be gay, but with him?" I said, thinking this would save me. "No way! I'd rather die." I said, laughing a bit more with them.

"Aw, but he makes up for what you don't have." Temari started and looked at me, I gave her a glare. "Eyebrows." And they both laughed again. It seemed I was getting laughed at a lot today, first Shukaku then these two.

"Whatever. First off, I'm not gay." They both gave me questioning smiles and I just glared at them. "Second off, if I was gay I'd pick someone better than him." Temari almost commented but I stopped her. "But I'm not gay."

"Are you sure? Then why don't you prove it by getting a girlfriend?" Temari challenged me; I just shook my head and gave her an uncaring smile.

"Why would I get a girlfriend just to prove you wrong? I actually think that me getting a girlfriend just because you said that would prove I was trying to hide my being gay." I paused and they started to laugh. "But I'm not gay." I added, again. They still chuckled a bit and I glared at them.

"We'd accept you, so why don't you just come out with it? We'll love you either way." Temari said, the last part sarcastically. They never really cared; they just wanted to mess with me.

"I'm telling you, I'm not gay. Just drop it." I said, keeping a steady glare.

"You're in denial! They say the more they deny it the more likely it's true." Temari said and Kankuro nodded his head in agreement. I narrowed my eyes even more so that they were tiny angry slits.

"I'm not gay." I said through my clenched teeth. I was actually getting angry. Why didn't they believe me? I knew it was a lie, but it was a believable lie, wasn't it? Did I seem gay? No, I was manly. At least, I think I'm manly.

"Still denying your feelings? Come on, you can tell us, we're family!" Temari continued to tease and snicker.

"More like even if I wanted to tell you I couldn't because you're family. But what's there to tell? I'm not gay." I said, still glaring. They just laughed.

"Whatever you say, little brother." Temari said, rolling her eyes. "Lets leave Kankuro, I think we've teased him enough today." Kankuro nodded, still snickering. They left, both smiling at their brother's suffering. I sighed. At least they didn't learn about Lee's visit. And if no one told them they would never know. I'd have to trust Shiya not to tell.

The rest of the day passed as any other, very boring and uneventful. I had my curtains closed so I barely noticed when it was tomorrow; the clock on my desk gave it away, though.

"Shukaku, it's tomorrow. Tell me now." I said aloud, not caring if someone heard me.

"Fine…" He said grumpily, and went on to explain his hair-brained scheme.

It had been worth the wait. His idea wasn't fool proof but it was still worth a shot. I filled out the paper work that allowed me to leave the village. By this time tomorrow I'd be on my way to Konoha, to see Tsunade-san, but more importantly, I hoped to see Konoha's lovely green beast.


	16. When all I know has been lost

Oh yeah, this one's in Lee's point of view! And it's like, one of the last chapters! Finally it's ending! T3T

Chapter 16: When all I know has been lost…

Throwing a flurry of aggravated punches at a large innocent tree stump he cursed himself in his mind. Why? Why had all this happened? It was all too confusing and to get some of his pent up frustration out he continued to beat on the poor dead tree.

I loved Gaara-san… No, I love Gaara-san. Why? I threw another power packed punch at my immobile target. Why had he been so cold? And after that night… I really thought we shared something, something indescribable. I spun counter-clockwise and kicked my target with a sort of resentment. I continued to kick it, working my legs now instead of my arms.

When I thought about him my heart hurt, it wasn't a pain like being stabbed, but more like the blood was being drained and turning cold. Did he really hate me? No, he couldn't. But why did he act that way towards me? Had he ever loved me? Had he just used me? Was it all one big mistake? I threw a bout of punches mixed with kicks at the wretched tree stump.

No, I couldn't let myself think like that! Something must've happened, did I do something wrong? Had we gone too fast? Did he regret it? I didn't, I cherished every moment we shared. What if he had decided he didn't want me, that I wasn't good enough? I threw more kicks and punches at my target; if I wasn't good enough for him I'd become good enough. Through hard work and determination anything's possible! Using my ninja way and proving myself worthy of his love I'd win over Gaara-sans heart! I landed a victorious punch onto the target, this one full of my hope and dreams. It knocked the tree stump up and out, roots and all. Since I had used my left arm it stung a bit, but I was proud of the pain. Physical pain was nothing, and if I didn't let the mental worries get to me I'd be good. But how long would it be before I saw Gaara-san again? Days? Months? Years? No! Not years, I couldn't stand to wait that long. He'd have to come here sooner or later, right? And if he didn't I find a way to visit him. Even if he refused to see me I'd see him, somehow. And when he saw me he'd fall in love, because I'd become the best man I could possibly become to prove my love for him.

But first I had to replace this dead tree. Now that the roots were out of the ground another tree could grow in its place. I moved the tree stump and roots, shaking off most of the dirt before tossing it aside. I looked around and gathered a couple of acorns off a near-by tree. I usually planted acorn trees, since they were easy and when they grew up they'd become homes of some of the squirrels in this forest. I went back to where the tree had been pulled out of the ground. The upturned earth was easy to move and soft to the touch. As I buried the tiny acorns I smiled. They were small now, but they had the potential to grow strong and tall, and over shadow everything. I swore that my love would be like these acorns, it might be small and almost unnoticeable right now but soon it'd swell and grow, overshadowing all doubt. I stood up and put my hands on my hips, looking up at the treetops.

"Lee!" I heard my name called and turned to see the bright blue-eyed fair-haired boy known as Naruto coming towards me.

"What is it, Naruto-san?" I asked, he stopped to catch his breath before answering. He looked up at me and I saw a smile on his small tan face. He was shorter than me by about half of a foot.

"It's Gaara! He's here in Konoha!" He said, excitement in his voice. Naruto had been the only person I had told about my feelings toward Gaara-san. After I had told him my tale of forbidden love he had told me his, about the love he and Sasuke secretly shared. I was a tad jealous of them; because they lived in the same village it was easier for them to see each other. But I was happy for Naruto; he deserved happiness after all he'd been through.

"Really? Why would he be here?" I asked, becoming anxious with anticipation. If Gaara-san was here already I didn't have time to become a better man for him. But he had come after only a few days; did he come to say he was sorry and that he wanted me back? Had he missed me as much as I had missed him?

"Yeah, he's here, but I don't know why. He's heading towards Tsunade-baba's place." Naruto said, looking away from me.

"Tsunade-sama?" I asked, to make sure. Why would he go to see her unless it was for business? He didn't come to see me, he came here on business…

Naruto nodded. "Yeah, but he's acting strange. I didn't talk to him personally but I saw him actually chatting with other people!" That was very out of character, especially considering it was Gaara-san we were talking about.

"Where is he right now?" I asked. Maybe if I went to see him… Maybe he wanted to see me. But he couldn't because he was here on business… That had to be it! So I must go to him.

"I'll show you, just follow me." Naruto said merrily, jumping into the trees, I followed close behind. My mind was racing, what was I supposed to do? What should I do when I see him? Do I just go up to him and proclaim my undying love for him? Or is that too flamboyant? Do I follow him until he's alone and then surprise him from behind? No, that one would probably get me killed. What if I proposed to him, promising that we'd never be apart again? But I haven't got a ring. My thoughts went as fast as my feet did as I followed the small and very agile Naruto through to forest until we arrived back at the village. I followed him onto the roofs of the buildings. He suddenly paused about three blocks away from the Hokage's tower. I had trouble stopping without running into him. I looked at Naruto as he looked down at the street.

"What is it?" I question, not yet looking down at the street. Naruto quickly turned to me and shushed me, motioning for me to come and look down at the dirt road. I came a few steps closer so I could easily see over the edge. I then spotted Gaara-san, standing there in the middle of the street. He was as lovely as I remembered, if not more. He was wearing his official Kazekage clothes, not the casual clothes I'd seen him wear before. I was only when I saw Gaara-sans lips move that I noticed he was talking with someone. I looked to see he was having a conversation with Neji. Why would he want to talk to him? Their conversation was short and ended with polite smiles, which was very out of the ordinary for both of them. Gaara walked away and continued towards the Hokage tower.

"You see what I mean?" Naruto said in a hushed voice to me. I nodded. I had subconsciously crouched down and now we both stood up. "Well, you can do the rest on your own. Good luck." He said, giving me his own rendition of the nice guy pose before leaving. I would've smiled and waved Naruto good bye but I was a little too confused to do anything. When I awoke moments later from my stupor I saw Gaara-san walking about a block ahead of me. I had to follow him, but I didn't know why. I could've just gone up to him, but I didn't want to, I wanted to see why he was here first. I followed him by rooftop and tried to be as stealthy as I could, which was pretty stealthy, since I'm a ninja and all.

He didn't stop to talk to anyone now, but now and then he'd look around very subtly. He knew his way, so why was he looking around? Was he looking around for something, or maybe, someone? Maybe he was looking for me… No, that couldn't be it. But I had to keep my hopes up. I followed him until he approached the door to the Hokage's tower. It seemed as if he sighed before he opened the door and stepped inside. I knew he'd have to go to the top floor to get to Tsunade-sama's office so I scaled the building and sat on the roof. What was he doing here? Why had Tsunade-sama sent for him? Or had he asked for a meeting with Tsunade-sama? I was tempted to go to the window in the office and peek in but I didn't. And if I did I'd only be spotted and give away my position. I'd just have to wait until the meeting was over and talk with Gaara-san afterwards.

So I sat there, maybe half an hour, enjoying the view. I looked up at the clouds, looked off into the forested distance. It was calm and relaxing. I still kept aware of my surroundings, in case Gaara-san came out of the building anytime soon. But nothing happened. No one came, no one left, and I didn't even hear or see any birds flying in the area. It seemed as if life and time itself had stopped. And we were all waiting for Gaara-san together.

All of a sudden I heard a rattling of a window, the Hokage's office window, to be exact. I didn't move, and for some reason I felt as if I was caught.

"Lee-san?" I heard Tsunade-sama's secretary like woman say, I could never remember her name. I quickly came over to the open window, wondering how they had known I was out here.

"Coming!" I said as I jumped into the open window, landing right beside the woman. I looked around to see smiles on both the Kazekage's and the Hokage's faces. What was going on?


	17. It is you I find

Okie dokie boys and girls! Here we are at the last 'chapter!' There will be an epilogue chater after this, so don't worry your pretty little heads! This title goes with the last chapter's title, see? It's like, the title of the story almost! Okay, so I'm sorry if this is lame, I don't like how it turned out. Thank you for reading and reviewing! And please read the epilogue chapter that will be posted as soon as I can finish it!

**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x**X**x

Chapter 17: It is you that I find. 

Lee's baffled look was priceless; he was priceless. This whole situation must have confused him, but he looked more than happy to see me, almost ecstatic. He might've acted differently if the two women hadn't been in the room but since they were he was just struck motionless and speechless for an instant. After the shock left him he quickly bowed to the Hokage and then to me.

"Good afternoon?" He said politely, not having meant for it to come out as a question. He was very much confused, his smile broken by pure befuddlement. I almost wanted to laugh, but that would've been a little too out of character.

"And a good afternoon to you, Lee. Please, sit down next to Gaara-san. We were just talking about you." Tsunade-san said calmly. He obeyed her, but his confusion only deepened as he sat next to me in a chair already placed there. He looked to me for answers but finding that he wouldn't get any he looked back to Tsunade-san.

"What…? How…?" He started, and then decided on what he'd ask first, "How did you know I was out there?"

"I know everything that goes on in my village. And right now you're the topic for some troubling controversy, so I needed you here. I'm going to ask you a few questions. After I finish, the Kazekage might have some questions of his own, and he'll ask you them. Alright?" Tsunade-san stated calmly. She was tougher in person than I had remembered. Lee nodded, he tried to say something but words failed him at the moment. Tsunade-san was one of the few people I respected enough to add a courteous suffix to their name. I respected Lee but I didn't add the suffix out of familiarity.

"Ok then, first question. Would you be willing to take on an S-rank mission, one you may never return from?" She asked, the smile on her features disappearing and being replaced by a look of the utmost importance. Lee paused, and then nodded his head solemnly.

"I'll be willing to do whatever it is you ask me to, Hokage-sama." He said, being the selfless person he was he actually meant that. He wasn't afraid to die for the sake of truth, justice, or youth.

"Good, second question. How do you feel about Sunagakure?" She asked, her look still intimidating. Lee hesitated even longer this time, wondering what this question had to do with anything. I already knew what the questions were and what they were for, the only thing I needed to know were Lee's reactions and answers.

"It's a good shinobi village and our alliance is strong. The people there are courteous and most of them are very skilled ninjas." He said, as if reading the answer of a fact sheet.

"Yes, it's true. But what is your personal opinion on it? How would you like staying there?" She said, a small smile entering her face. Lee was confused and surprised at the same time. Having no idea how this was all going to work out, he answered.

"It's nice, the difference between here and there is large, but it's got it's own beauty. If told to stay there for a mission I would not mind in the slightest." He said, a smile encompassing his features as he talked. He was getting less and less nervous, but he was still completely confused. Tsunade-san nodded at his answer.

"Third question. How do you feel about the Kazekage to your right?" She said letting herself smile. Lee turned a light shade of crimson as he looked at me and then turned back to Tsunade-san.

"I have fallen head over heels in love with the Kazekage, Tsunade-sama." He proclaimed boldly. His face was beet red but his look was determined. I let myself smile slightly at him as he caught my eye, which only made his face redden to its fullest extent.

"I suspected as much." Tsunade-san said shooting us both sly smiles. "That being said, here's my last question. Would you do anything and everything to protect the Kazekage?" She asked, shooting Lee another serious look. His face partly returned to normal, a small blush still apparent.

"Of course I would. I would die for Gaara-san." He said, absolutely serious. He was just that kind of person. He was still perplexed but completely sure of himself. I felt something stir deep inside of me; like my heart was going burst he was filling it so much. All the parts I'd sealed off, he was reawakening the parts I thought had died. I had been broken, and he was able to fix me.

"Very good. Kazekage-san? Anything you'd like to add before I tell Lee about his mission?" Tsunade-san said. I didn't know if I had anything more to add. What was there to add? Once she explained this all to him he'd definitely be excited. Or would he? Would he choose me over his home, his friends, his way of life? By asking him to do this, was I tearing him away from everything he knew and loved?

"I'd just like Lee to know it's his decision to make. He does not need to be the one to fill this position." I said calmly. Tsunade-san shot me a look of momentary disbelief. I just nodded to her, Lee's confusion only growing. Lee was the only one who could take this position, and I knew that. But I didn't want him to feel like he was being forced into anything.

"As I said, Lee, this is a classified S-rank mission. Should you feel up to it you could start on it today. I don't know how long this mission will last, only the Kazekage will know for sure when it has ended." She looked towards me quickly then back at Lee. "If you should choose to take on this mission, you shall become the Kazekage's personal bodyguard." She said, an unneeded emphasis on 'personal.' "And you would hold that position until further notice. You would be taking on this mission not only for your village, but also for the Kazekage himself. He came to me, asking for assistance. Our alliance being as strong as it is, I agreed to let you become his bodyguard, if that was what you decided. But this does not exclude you from other missions. Even though you'd be living with the Kazekage I would still expect you to check in, take on missions given to you that wouldn't interfere with what the Kazekage gave you to do. Is that clear?" Lee, after pausing to take all the information in, nodded. "Alright, so are you ready to take on this assignment?"

"Of course I am. As I said, I'd do anything for Kazekage-san. Plus you said I'd be doing it for my village. I would never want to let you down, Tsunade-sama!" Lee said, giving her an honest hardworking smile. Tsunade-san shook her head a little, smiling.

"You're a model ninja, Lee. Even though I'm sure we'll still see each other, I'll miss having you around. And I'm sure your fellow villagers will agree. We'll all miss having our Beautiful Green Beast around." She said, giving Lee a sad smile. Lee's eyes were welling up with tears as he stood up and reached for her hand. She gave him hers without hesitation they shook hands as if sealing a deal.

"I'll miss everyone dearly." He said, his voice cracking a bit. I stood up, realizing it was time for our exit. I don't believe I have said one thing directly to Lee yet, and vise versa.

"Thank you very much, Tsunade-san." I said, nodding to her, she smiled in return.

"Take care, of yourself and your new bodyguard. I'm expecting you to not let him over exert himself." She said, almost winking. I gave her a small smile before turning to leave.

"Thanks so much, Tsunade-sama. I will be the best bodyguard ever, and I'll continue to do even more missions! Tell everyone goodbye for me! I'll miss you and everyone else but I will still keep you all here, in my heart." I heard Lee say after me. I walked out of the office, Lee trailing close behind as he waved and bowed. As the door closed behind him we turned to look at each other in the silent corridor. Lees smile dwindled down to almost nothing as he looked at me, he was nervous again. I had missed him so much, but now that we were together again I could hardly think. I hadn't planned this far ahead. The silence thickened as we stood there, both of us at a loss of what to do next. An idea stuck me.

"First order of business." I said casually as he looked at me. "Kiss me." I said, my face heating up only slightly. As we held each other's gaze he finally stepped closer, and I added a commanding, "Now."

"Yes sir." He said, and I might have taken him seriously if he hadn't been such a bright red. He carefully and very slowly came closer, almost bringing his lips to mine before pausing in nervousness. Pushing myself upward onto my tiptoes I brought my lips to his, not wanting to wait for him to work up the nerve. We held the position for a moment, Lee still in shock, before he brought his arms around me. I let myself fall onto the balls of my feet again and broke away from him.

"You failed to complete your first order. As punishment you'll have to complete the first order a hundred more times." I said, giving him a stern look. He just smiled down at me, getting the game now.

"I promise a hundred kisses then, starting with this one." He said, leaning down and giving me a quick peck on the lips. "But I must say that this isn't a sufficient punishment. I'll have to give you an innumerable amount of kisses to make up for it." He leaned down again as I wrapped my arms around him. He let his lips linger, and soon I found him inside my mouth without realizing I had let him in. He was getting better at this. As our tongues clashed I felt nothing but him, and wanted nothing but this. But he broke away, and I remember where we were again. We couldn't be caught like this already, that'd look bad.

"We'll continue this later." I said, my command leaving no room for argument, but I didn't think he'd disagree. He smiled and let go of me, stepping back so he could give me a salute.

"Yosh." He said, trying to look serious as a smile broke out onto his lips. I turned around and headed for the stairs but found myself being lifted, I looked up at the owner of the arms around me in confusion.

"You came all the way here from Sunagakure, and as your personal body guard I must ensure your health, so I shall carry you back, so you can get some rest." He said in reply to my questioning gaze, smiling.

"If you insist." I said, but I wasn't complaining. I didn't need the rest but the thought of Lee's arms around me was comforting. I hadn't brought my gourd with me, knowing I wouldn't need force for this meeting, so I fit into his arms easily. It was a couple day's journey, even with Lee's speed, and I wouldn't let him over exert himself. We'd find something to do in the two or three days journey for rest, though there wouldn't be much sleeping involved. I'd let him rest fully soon enough, but not just yet. I'd waited too long to be loved, and now was the time to make up for all my years spent without.


	18. Epilogue

Chapter 18: Epilogue. 

Time comes and then leaves, a year passes by. Well, almost a year, it's a week short. This is the ending, the part where the plot is all wrapped up and sealed with a tiny red bow. This past year has passed by quickly, but not too quietly. The love shared between our two heroes has been limitless. It's an all smiles and kisses kind of ending, so sit back and read this knowing that everything will work out in the end. If a lovey dovey ending isn't what you wanted then you've come to the wrong place, because when it comes to these boy's love, everything is perfect. Because in their perspective, their partner is flawless. Well, maybe not flawless…

"I'm so sorry Gaara-san!" He said in a fast whisper to me as we entered the hallway leading out of the office building. I didn't say anything just yet; I didn't want to discuss anything in this open hallway. I didn't even turn to look at him or hesitate; I kept a steady pace towards the doors leading out of the building. He mumbled another soft apology before quietly and obediently following me out the building.

As I opened the doors a rush of hot, dry, desert air greeted me warmly. The wind kicked sand up into my face but the feeling was one I'd learned to enjoy, almost like rain to most other people. The air dried my throat, which gave me an excuse to stay quiet for the moment. Life was never perfect, and I knew that well, so I couldn't be too angry with him. It wasn't his fault he was such an honest person. Actually, that was one of the many things that made him so attractive. But sometimes, like in our current case, honesty was neither needed nor wanted.

We continued our silent walk through the village until we reached the large mansion-like building that was my new home. I had been permitted to use it ever since I became the Kazekage, but before now there been no reason. But living with Lee was a little complicated when living in the office bedroom, as we had learned the hard way. So now we lived, just the two of us, in this overly large and extravagant house.

I swiftly opened the door using my set of keys and walked into our home, Lee coming in behind me, closing and locking the door. I smiled a bit to myself. This house smelled of sand, whatever Lee used for his hair, and sex. We've made love in every room, in almost every possible position we could think of. This included the kitchen's pantry, all the closets, and even the small storage room under the stairs. I frowned, now remembering how Lee had gotten me so upset earlier. Though, now alone with him in the privacy of our home, I wasn't as mad.

I made my way to a large living room on the right side of the entrance hall, Lee still following close behind, almost whimpering an apology. I headed for a large red armchair that was placed in the upper right corner of the huge room. As I sat down my hand immediately flew to my forehead as I subconsciously rubbed the tension out of my temples. Lee took this as a sign that I was angry and didn't jump onto me, as he would have in any other situation. He just sat at my feet, like a puppy waiting for its master to recognize it's presence. I almost smiled at my comparing Lee to a puppy, but didn't. I wanted him to believe I was still angry with him. I'd get something good out of him if I gave him forgiveness, and I knew it. I didn't want to make him feel bad, but I did kind of want him to owe me.

"Lee, that wasn't the brightest thing you've done since you've been here." I said, disapproval in my voice. I looked down at him to see his large brown eyes welling up with overly dramatic crocodile tears. I kept my facade and didn't smile at his cuteness, though it was really hard.

"I didn't mean to, Gaara-san, please forgive me!" He said, letting a few of his tears fall as he wrapped his arms around my shins. I had finally gotten him to call me just 'Gaara' but when he thought I was really angry with him he always seemed to revert back to adding the unappreciated '-san.' I didn't scold him though, because it was kind of cute how he would say it, as a sort of plead of desperation.

"That doesn't change the fact that you a) fell asleep during an important meeting and b) when waking from this unwanted nap you blurted out personal information regarding our sex life. Not to mention that this all happened in front of some of the most important people in Sunagakure. You realize I'll never be able to look any of those men in the eye ever again, don't you?" I said, adding a sigh afterwards. It was true; I'd never be able to glare down those men again. But it was a small price to pay. Though Lee felt that he should be blamed for it all I didn't blame him. I had made sleeping rough for him the night before, which would explain why he had needed a nap in the office. But he was only concerned about me, and now he thought I was angry with him. I'd forgive him, but not before I knew I was getting the better end of the bargain.

"I'm really sorry, Gaara-san! I'll do anything to make up for it! Anything!" He said frantically. I smiled, but I didn't let him see the smile. I turned my face away from him and looked towards the couch, very dirty thoughts racing through my mind. I had never thought like this before Lee came into my life, but now I was turning into a bit of a pervert.

"Anything?" I questioned. There were a lot of 'anything's I could think of right now.

Let me take this moment to inform you of how I've grown in the past year. With Lee constantly nagging me like a bad housewife I've been able to grow almost a whole foot. He's had me eat right, tried to get me to sleep right, and definitely helped with exercise. Lee's grown a bit himself, but instead of being so much shorter than him, I can now proudly state that I am only a few inches shorter than him. It's not that surprising, my whole family's tall and I _am_ eighteen. Though he's still taller than me, and probably always will be.

"Yeah, anything." He said cautiously, almost regretting saying that. He knew how my mind worked now, and as I turned to face him again he almost flinched at my smirk.

"You're forgiven." I said in an even voice and he jumped onto me, putting his arms around my neck and forcing himself onto me.

"Oh thank you Gaara!" He practically squealed as he nuzzled my neck.

"But you owe me one." I stated. He nodded his head in agreement.

"I'll do my best to fulfill any task you give me, Gaara." He said proudly as he pulled his face away from my neck. Our eyes met, and with the undying passion that sparked our lips soon found each other. His arms still around my neck I stood up and he was forced to stand up with me, our lips locked. I put my arms around his waist and slowly nudged him over to the couch were I pushed him down, our mouths parting sorrowfully. I placed myself on top of him and our tongues practically greeted each other in midair out of eagerness. As I put my arms around his waist and played with the hem of his shirt he pushed me onto my side, so we both laid facing each other. As we broke away to pant our eyes meet once again, this time sparking a different reaction in me.

"Marry me." I practically panted. Lee looked at me confused for a moment, a large blush appearing on his face.

"What?" He stuttered, outright confused.

"Marry me." I said, evenly this time. His confusion only deepened. I shook my head and tightened my grip around his waist. I was about to explain myself when he finally responded.

"It's my greatest wish to marry you, Gaara." He said, the words coming from his throat slowly and deliberately. His brow furrowed again, and he added, "Please don't talk about it so casually."

"Don't think I'm making light of our situation, Lee." I added his name deliberately, to catch his attention and let him know I was completely serious. Knowing I had ruined the mood and now we needed to talk of important matters uninterrupted I moved to sit up. Lee did the same and we sat side by side on the large red couch facing each other.

"I always thought this would be a little more romantic and a little less business-like, you know?" Lee said with a sigh, and I placed my hand on top of his, for support.

"Yeah, but you're with the Kazekage, everything is treated like a matter of the utmost importance. Especially our future plans…" I said quietly. I had wanted to discuss this topic for sometime, now was better than never.

"I know. But why right now?" He said sadly as he turned his hand over so he could grip mine.

"It's been almost a year since you came here. And we're both already 18. If not now then when?" I said, as he laced his fingers with mine.

"You're right. So, should I propose?" He asked, ready to get down on one knee.

"No, the actually proposal should be more romantic, surprise me with the proposal, but make it soon." I said smiling. He returned the smile and I leaned into his chest.

"Wow, a whole yet and yet only a year. It seems like just yesterday I was back home training with Gai-sensei but it also seems like we've been together for eons." He said happily. "But I never tire of you, like I could spend the rest of forever with you without any complications."

"But there will be complications." I said sadly, putting my legs over his, practically sitting in his lap. "Do you realize how much change will come with our being married?" I said. I had asked myself this question quite a few times, and the answer never pleased me.

"Everything will change and yet, nothing will change at the same time. I can't love you more than I do now, and I'll never love you any less." He said, putting his arms around my waist and pulling me to chest in a tight embrace.

"Yes, but…" I started but stopped, was I being a downer? I kept only thinking of the negative things our marriage would bring, what of the positive things? And what did I really want? When I thought about it, I really did want this to happen, more than anything. I wanted to seal our bond, with something real. I wanted everyone to know of the love we shared, and that we needed no others. I smiled and continued, "But what of everyone else?"

"Forget them, no one else matters." He said, as I knew he would. He didn't mean that, and I knew I didn't mean it, either. But for the moment, while I was in his arms, I believed that statement whole-heartedly. And as the tension from the topic evaporated our contact became less comforting and more sexual. He smiled at me and he moved his lips to mine, and as I moved my legs to straddle him.

What we had was love, and you know what? No matter how jealous you are of it, you know it's true. We had understanding, love, sexual attraction, friendship, everything a good couple needed. And to think, it had all started as an impulse to kill.

As he moved his wet mouth over my collarbone I moaned in delight. His hands were already working to get my clothes of, and mine hands stripping off his. This feeling, the feeling we gave to each other, the feeling we both received, it was pure ecstasy. And I never want this feeling to **end.**

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Tada! That's the ending! (I know, lame, but I had fun!) Thank you to all my reviewers! Without you this chapter might not have been made. I was thinking of just stopping it at 17. Maybe I should have? I finally put their ages in this chapter! Woot! Okay, don't get your hopes up for a sequel, because I _might _do it, but probably not soon, if at all. I have a few other stories I want to get up before I even think about writing a sequel to this one. Please check out my other stuff if you liked this! I'll be posting new stories soon.


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